Motivation Article: GPS for the Heart Part 2 of 2

May 13, 2023 by  
Filed under Faith, Faith Articles

By Robert Eberline 
In Part 1 of this article, I explored dating from a single’s perspective.  In Part 2, I’ll delve into the minds of married couples for their input on this subject.  As far as married couples go, Rebecca hit the proverbial nail on the head. She said, “An integral part of a successful marriage is your faith. Believing in God, amplifies your faith an infinite number of times. Faith that the almighty can take care of the problems life throws at you makes all the difference in your attitude about life.” 

Although Rebecca has never been married (neither have I) God will not steer her wrong. But where did some of these married couples meet? Fred and Linda (55, 50) met through the internet. They emailed each other for a while first and when they were comfortable with each other, they met in person. There are many places to meet on the internet; some have more success stories than others. As it is with church, find a site that feels like “home”. Then post your profile and search for friendship first. Jim and Kasey (32, 29) were introduced at the wedding of mutual friends. Jim knew the groom, and Kasey was friends with the bride. They were placed at the same table. Their meeting, recalled by a friend, “I was trying to strike up a conversation with Kasey but, every time I asked a question, she looked at Jim and answered.” Jim actually thought that his friend was doing pretty well conversing with Kasey but, of course, he was the one that matched with her. Carl and Lindsay (33, 30) met at church. Both volunteered for a conference teaching children. Lindsay was living in South Carolina at the time, and Carl lived in Atlanta. It is amazing how God works! Carl recalls, “We hit it off right away but I was nervous. She was so beautiful, I was tongue tied.” Carl and Lindsay talked on the phone and emailed each other for quite a while before they got married.

Meeting the one you marry and overcoming some of the obstacles that marriage entails are two entirely different matters. For instance, Fred and Linda mention that in marriage you have a give and take situation. “Sometimes it is a 60/40 split and you should learn the art of compromise. You do not want to lose who you are, but you do want to act like a team.” Jim and Kasey agree, and add that having a mutual respect for each other and their values are also important. They believe that keeping the lines of communication open, trusting each other, can make all the difference. Carl and Lindsay share the same family values, basically staying on the same page. This helps keep their relationship strong. All six mention that each tries to bring out the good side of their spouse. They care about each other, communicate, and compromise when needed. They remain considerate to one another, and have a strong faith in God. Carl and Lindsay put God first above everything else. They try to out serve each other.

The Bible does not really talk about dating. It does give Christians some principles to follow during the time before marriage. Firstly, realizing that we must separate from the world's view on dating is because it contradicts God's way (2 Peter 2:20). Society tells us to date around as much as we want, going through as many people as possible. Instead, discovering what kind of person we are getting into a relationship with, before making that commitment seems more on par with the Bible. We should find out if the person has been born again in the Spirit of Christ (John 3:3-8), and if they share the same desire to serve Christ (2 Corinthians 6:14-15). If not, then this could weaken your relationship with
Christ or compromise your morals and standards.

Loving the Lord above anyone else (Matthew 10:37) is the “shark repellant needed to combat idolatry, which is a sin (Galatians 5:20, Colossians 3:5). Also, be careful of having pre-marital sex (1 Corinthians 6:9, 13, 2 Timothy 2:22) because sexual immorality is a sin not only against God but against your own body (1 Corinthians 6:18). It is important to love and honor others as you love yourself (Romans 12:9-10), and this is certainly true for dating or marriage as well. Following these biblical principles is the best way to have a secure foundation for a marriage. It is one of the most important decisions you will ever make because when two people marry, they join to one another and become one flesh (Genesis 2:24, Matthew 19:5).

Basically, even though Valentine’s Day is approaching and we as Christians can feel a little bit annoyed by some of the pressures that society can put on us. As long as we figure out what we are looking for, and connect with like minded individuals, we will be just fine. The Bible has quite a few of the answers to the questions that we ask. If we place God first in our lives, continue to have faith, and “love thy neighbor,” dating, relationships, and marriage will work itself out. Enjoy Valentine’s Day for what it is, showing your loved one how much you care; by praying for them.  

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