Seeing through Trees

By Peter Lundell –

Paralleling my mother’s apartment is a thick stand of trees. Summer grows an impenetrable green. Autumn drops the leaves to uncover winter skeletons of branches through which I see all houses on the other side. Spring buds restart the cycle.

The cycle helps me overcome temptation. Through the sameness of daily life and annual events, I’m tempted to feel a sense of permanence, as if the people I know will always be there and the things I do, I will continue to do. But behind the appearance of sameness lurks an ending. Always.

Children feel as if their parents will always be there to watch over them. Adults feel as if they’ll go to work at the same place for eternity. Meeting relatives or old friends feels as if they’ll always be there next season, and that I will too. For thousands of years people have probably felt the same way. But there always lurks an ending.

Most of us prefer permanence and sameness to change. We like familiar, predictable, and comfortable. But permanence and sameness are temporary, even illusory. So I’ve started to resist that sense of permanence, the feeling of sameness. To do so, I must willfully embrace change and accept that no one and nothing will be around forever.

And when I do that, I live better.

A sense of permanence and sameness lulls a person into a daze that can cloud life for decades. Change and the cycles of life are often challenging or agonizing. But embracing change—as Ecclesiastes 3:1 says, “There is a time for everything”—prepares us for the difficulties.

And that wakes us up to live more fully here and now. Our hearts embrace and our minds understand God’s hand in life.

And our eyes just might discover our path into eternity.

PRAYER: “Father, open my eyes to see through the things in my life that seem so permanent, so the same. Enable me to see beyond them, where You will take me. I trust You to enable me to face whatever I must.”

BIBLE VERSE: “Teach us to number our days aright, that we may gain a heart of wisdom” (Psalm 90:12, NIV).

Being Real, Fake Nails and All

By Connie Cavanaugh –

Needing accountability to stick to regular exercise, I asked four women to walk with me, one each day, Monday through Thursday every week.

Last week “Wednesday” called to see when I wanted to walk that day. I snagged the portable phone between shoulder and chin and continued sanding my heels.

“Sheesh!” I wailed, “I don’t know if I can make it today!”

She pressed me for details.

“Well, I’m the keynote speaker at a women’s event tomorrow night so today I have to get a haircut, wax my eyebrows, shave my legs, bleach my teeth, tweeze my chin hairs, borrow an outfit from ‘Tuesday’ and stick on fake fingernails.”

She agreed that I had a lot to do and asked what I planned to talk about.

“Being real, you know, being yourself,” I replied.

“Fake fingernails and a borrowed outfit so you can talk about being yourself?!” She couldn’t stop laughing.

She quickly convinced me I needed some fresh air and exercise and a friend to share it with so an hour later we were on the trail. She gently probed to find out why I was sounding stressed.

“I thought you enjoyed public speaking,” she began.

“I do. I love it,” I replied. “But I feel so inadequate…surely there are thousands of people out there who have deeper insights, more varied experiences, a richer prayer life, a more disciplined Bible study regimen than I do. What I do best is make people laugh. Anybody can do that.”

“I can’t,” Wednesday replied, stopping and looking right into my eyes.

We stood there, looking mutely at one another.

“You can’t?” I asked, doubting I had heard correctly.

“Nope, I can’t,” she said.

“But you wrote an Old Testament study manual for seminary students in Hungarian!” I countered. “You lived overseas as a missionary. You don’t need to make people laugh. You’re a scholar and an educator and a Bible study teacher and…”

“And you can do something I can’t do,” she interrupted. “You can make people laugh. How is your God-given gift any less than mine?”

I had no answer so we resumed our tramp.

We continued on in silence and, as God so often does, He spoke to me through the voice of a godly friend. His message, as always, was simple: recognize your gifts as coming from Me and use them for My sake.

As soon as I got home I made a cup of tea to take off the chill and grabbed the nearest Bible; it was The Message. I opened it to where a bookmark had been left and my eyes fell on this highlighted section:

We who have run for our very lives to God have every reason to grab the promised hope with both hands and never let go. It’s an unbreakable spiritual lifeline, reaching past all appearances right to the very presence of God where Jesus, running on ahead of us, has taken up his permanent post as high priest for us…Hebrews 6:19, 20

I was humbled and in awe of God who is personally involved in our lives. I thanked Him for Jesus who was running on ahead and I thanked him for making me the person I am. I promised to encourage others, as “Wednesday” had encouraged me, not only to be who they were created to be but to be thankful for who they are.

And while I sipped the last of my tea, I glued on my bright red nails.

A New Twist on the List

By Hally Franz –

I made a bold move during the Christmas season of 2012. After years of considering, even threatening this particular change, I made the move. I did not send cards, letters or pictures out for the holiday – no festive stamped correspondence at all. It was a tough thing to give up. I like the tradition and enjoy receiving greetings from friends and family, but this season I felt I could spend my time better in other ways.

So, as we begin 2013, I am going to expand this mindset of reducing. Typically, my resolutions are in the form of tasks I hope to accomplish in the New Year. I resolve to: cook healthier meals for my family, maintain a regular routine of exercise, complete scrapbooks for our family’s last ten years of vacations, read more, write more, clean out my basement and so on. The list is pretty much the same each year, because the same tasks usually remain undone from year to year.

This year, I am staging a revolt against the standard resolution list that I make annually. Perhaps, “revolt” is too strong a word. I am not really a revolt kind of girl. Given the fact that I just used the word “girl” to describe myself, I may be delusional, but revolutionary I am not. Let’s call it a simple rebellion.

My 2013 resolution is to cut back. For many of us, those working both outside and in the home, our lists of obligations and duties tend to accumulate over time. When I left my school counseling position a few years ago I had an open slate for a time. Soon, though, I had taken on a variety of activities connected with school, church, my kids’ extra-curricular activities and more. Now, I often find myself overwhelmed with tasks and no closer to accomplishing those resolution items that linger.

It’s time to eliminate stuff from my life, both literally and figuratively. I think I will start by examining what I do and why I do it, by really asking if this is something in which I need to continue investing my time and talent.

Maybe you’ll want to give it a try. It’s daring to be sure. I’m committed, though, and when asked what my New Year’s Resolution is for 2013, I’ll proudly announce that I am not taking on anything new; I’m just going to do a lot less!

PRAYER: Lord, guide me to make good choices in my life. Give me wisdom to select the activities and goals that You deem worthy and in accordance with Your plan for me.

“‘Martha, Martha,’ the Lord answered, ‘you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her’” (Luke 10:41-42 NIV).

Marriage: Down and Dirty

By Lori Freeland –

It’s January. Our anniversary month. I have learned a lot about marriage over the last twenty-one years that I’d like to share. Here are the things no one will tell you before you walk down the aisle, along with some reasons to hack it out on the days when being single sounds more appealing.

You can have a soul mate. You just have to work at it. Nothing substantial in a relationship comes naturally—most things need time to grow. Time doesn’t happen overnight. You earn your soul mate by baring the most intimate parts of your being and letting him do the same. After so many years, you just know each other better than anyone else. You know the way he likes his socks folded and where he hides his “special” quarters. You memorize his order at various fast food places and automatically pick up cotton boxer briefs and white crew cut socks. You know him. And he knows you. You have a unique connection with each other—an intimate, private bond that only marriage can produce.

He can read your mind. And you can read his too—to a certain extent. You’ve watched him respond for twenty years. You probably know what he’s going to say about your mother coming to visit for two weeks before you even drop the news. You know he doesn’t cry during the sad part of a movie but you also know if you glance up, he’ll be biting his lip. He knows you’ve had it with driving the kids around and offers to pick your daughter up from choir. He sees you’ve had a bad day and stays out of your way afraid your bite will be worse than your bark—after all he’s had experience with both.

Real love walks a fine line between like and hate. Love sticks deep down in your gut, lodged tight in a place not easily shaken. But there are moments, hours, days where he’s at the bottom of your happy list. And that’s okay. You’re in it for the long term. He feels the same way about you when you spend all his “special” quarters on a new rug for the living room and the dog he told you not to bring home pees all over it.

History is a story that you live together. You make memories together—over years, children, financial struggles, and heart-wrenching crises. I’ve known my husband since I was sixteen years old. I could never give the knowledge of sixteen-year-old me to someone new. My husband lived through the bad years after my parents divorced. He watched me grow and mature, become a mother, and walked the journey next to me when our son fought a four year battle with leukemia. You can’t dump that information on someone new and expect them to comprehend your soul. So stick it out.

It really does get easier. As you walk the road of life and your children grow older, you’re building a bond of trust and a layer of comfort with each other. Twenty years into your marriage, you can look at him and say, “Not tonight” and he’ll know it’s not him but your teen’s emotions you’re struggling with. You can sit down next to him on the couch and hold his hand—just because. You can look into his eyes and say, “I really just need you to say something nice to me today—even if you don’t mean it.” And he will. And he may even mean it.

That’s the beauty of sticking it out. Walking through the bad and embracing the good. The rollercoaster analogy is fair and some years you will see more deep valleys than lofty peaks. But remember, the ride is always worth it in the end.

“Drink water from your own cistern, running water from your own well. Should your springs overflow in the streets, your streams of water in the public squares? Let them be yours alone, never to be shared with strangers. May your fountain be blessed, and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth. A loving doe, a graceful deer—” (Proverbs 5:15-19 NIV).

Hidden Gifts

By Susan Dollyhigh –

I discovered the tiny red package hidden behind the Christmas tree. The white bow I’d taken such pains to tie was undone, a ragged corner had been chewed by the dog, and the once shiny wrapping paper was dull and wrinkled from water that had leaked from the tree stand. Even in its tattered state, I recognized this package that held a precious gift I had purchased for my niece. On Christmas Eve, my large family became caught up in the frenzy of ripping off bows, tearing into packages, and oohing and aahing over presents, and this gift remained hidden and was overlooked. I delivered the sad-looking little box to my niece and told her, “This package has had a rough life but the gift inside should be fine.” My niece gently opened the neglected and overlooked box and found a shining golden locket inside, perfect and intact.

My heart was much like that battered Christmas package. A difficult childhood, an early marriage and a tumultuous life had left me feeling that I didn’t have even one gift to enjoy, much less one I could share with the world. Even though I’d accepted Christ as my Savior as a young girl, it wasn’t until my adult years that I became intimately acquainted and fell in love with Him.

Finally accepting the fact that He created me and unconditionally loves me allowed my tattered heart to heal and as it did, I discovered precious gifts, perfect and intact, that had been hidden for decades. I found self-worth and self-esteem, laughter and playfulness, a deep love and caring for others, and the totally unexpected gift of writing. My loving Father had given me many gifts to enjoy – even ones that I could share with the world; I just hadn’t guarded my heart and had almost missed out on His blessings.

When we allow Jesus into our hearts, He can heal the scars caused by abuse and repair the broken spirit. Wonderful God-given gifts are then just waiting to be discovered.

PRAYER: Loving Father, thank you for your healing grace. Thank you that it’s never too late to discover the gifts that you have given us and to use them to bring glory to You.

BIBLE VERSE: “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” (Proverbs 4:23 NIV)

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