No Two Alike

By Hally Franz –

Every day I am reminded of how different my two children are from one another. We have both a biological child and an adopted child, but I think this is something most parents observe even among biological siblings.

My son is serious-minded and independent, a bit of a loner. He loves anything old from classic movies and music to antique farm equipment. My daughter, on the other hand, is very social and a pleaser. She is more playful than responsible, a lover of trends. I recognize the benefits and pitfalls of both their personality types.

I once heard someone say that “equal is not always fair.” I think the expression was used in the context of education, but it applies to parenting as well. Treating my children the same is not always the right thing to do. What might be right for one, may not serve the best interests of the other. That’s yet another challenge of parenting—each child requires something different in terms of discipline, opportunity and counsel along the way.

I have two children, and, at times, I feel inadequate when I see mothers of four, five and more children managing their large families with grace and proficiency. However, the Lord blessed us with two, and they have managed to keep their father and I plenty busy.

Our Heavenly Father has how many children? Billions? He knows what each and every one of us needs. He is aware of our uniqueness, because he made us. And, He knows what lessons I need to learn, what weaknesses and gifts I have, what experiences will help me grow in faith. He has a handle on it all.

What a comfort it is to know that our Lord is constantly looking out for the best interests of all His children, even while we parents strive and struggle to know how best to handle ours.

PRAYER: Heavenly Father, please guide me each day in the rearing of my children. Help me to provide them with the training and tools they need to build happy, Christian lives and families.

“The Father has loved us so much! This shows how much he loved us: We are called children of God. And we really are his children. But the people in the world don’t understand that we are God’s children, because they have not known him” (1 John 3:1 ERV).

The Ivy

By Hally Franz –

Finally, spring has arrived! After a long and snowy winter, it’s a joy to feel warm breezes through open windows, pluck a dewy tulip from the garden, smell heavy piles of freshly-mowed grass, and experience the sensation of poison ivy when moist bumps pop up on winter-white skin. Rewind!

Yes, spring has sprung, and with it a variety of wonderful long-awaited pleasures. However, we forget all about THE IVY in the dead of winter.

My son worked for a landscaper friend of ours in April. They mulched beds and pulled weeds, and Ivan ended up with a nasty case of poison ivy. He’s had bouts with the vicious weed before, but this was his worst case to date, attacking his underarm and moving from there.

We treated the areas with anti-itch creams and drying lotions, which provided a bit of relief. However, after a solid week of scratching and spreading we called the doctor. He prescribed the big guns, a steroid to take care of the rash. Once the recommended dosage was gone, the situation was much improved, but it still took several days for it to disappear.

Poison ivy attacks without us knowing it. Many times we don’t recognize it or even see it in our environment. Some can sit right on it and be unaffected. Others are highly allergic to it. It may be a few bumps for some, but, for others, it may linger for weeks. Poison ivy seems more potent at the time of year when we may be most vulnerable, after months spent mainly indoors.

The sins in the world can be a bit like this wicked weed. I think about my children as they grow, and I wonder how they will handle the bad things they encounter in daily life. Will they recognize ungodly people and behaviors in their schools and community? Will they resist them, or will they be tempted to follow? If they fall, and they will at times, do they have the skills needed to leave a sinful pattern and grow in their faith?

I hope they do. Parents all hope for this. Perhaps our best defense against the disease of sin is to inoculate our children with a healthy dose of Christian faith, teach them to make wise decisions based on His word, and encourage them to come to us when they need aid.

PRAYER: Heavenly Father, please guide me in the rearing of my children and the teaching of all children in my circle, so that I will share with them Your word always as the guide for surviving the challenges they will face as they grow.

“He guides the humble in what is right and teaches them his way” (Psalm 25:9 NIV).

The Wedding Wall

By Hally Franz –

My grandparents would have been married 80 years this November, and while they didn’t reach that milestone, Grandpa and Grandma did celebrate 69 years of marriage. I always remember what year they were wed, because their 60th anniversary occurred the year my husband, Tim, and I were married. We just celebrated our 20th anniversary.

My aunt has a display of family photos I dearly love. One wall holds 5×7 photographs of every marriage our family has celebrated over the years; only three, which ended, have been removed. My grandparents’ black-and-white photo is at the top. The next row includes photos from the weddings of their four children. Eight of us eleven grandchildren, along with our spouses, fill the third row in full color. And the bottom group consists of wedding ceremonies for five of the 23 great-grandchildren. There are currently five great-great-grandchildren, with more weddings and babies added yearly.

My cousins and I sometimes gather at the photos and laugh at the ever-changing wedding styles. Big hair and bunned hair, full skirts and sheath dresses share the space. Long sleeves and sweetheart necklines evolve over generations to sleeveless and strapless. It’s fun to see how fashions have changed and how our family has grown in eight decades. The wall is a source of family pride.

Like wedding fashions and families, marriages evolve over time. Looking back, I can recall trials and triumphs Tim and I have experienced over the years.

Growing our family was a struggle, but eventually we experienced the joys of having a biological son and bringing home a beautiful adopted daughter. Tim recently celebrated thirty years of employment with his company, and he has supported me in my various endeavors outside and inside our home. There have been losses and times of turmoil – some years and memories better than others.

We’ve grown a lot in our faith since 1993, and our Heavenly Father has been with us during our most difficult and joyous times. If He had not, we may not have reached this anniversary.

So, what will the next twenty years bring? More photos added to my aunt’s wedding wall? No doubt. Perhaps a return to sleeves? I hope. Grandchildren? Not during the first ten, please. New goals and dreams? Of course. The comfort that each day we share will be because of Him, shared by Him, governed by Him, and blessed by Him. Absolutely!

PRAYER: Gracious God, thank You for the gift of marriage! Help us make each day count as a couple, enjoying our relationship while serving You in our home, church and community.

“Give to the LORD, O families of the peoples, Give to the LORD glory and strength.” (1 Chronicles 16:28 NKJV).

Grumbling and Gratefulness

By Hally  Franz –

Today marks the fourth snow day local children have had this year; in fact, it is the fourth they’ve had since President’s Day in February. Yesterday set records for the most snowfall in one day in our area, and we are nearing the end of March.

Therefore, much of the conversation in recent days has gone something like this… “I like snow at Christmas and over our holiday break. I don’t like it when I am thinking about spring.” “This cold, dreary weather is growing tiresome and depressing. I need some sun!” “Now, the end of the school year is extended!”

Then, reluctantly, after our complaining, we acknowledge that… “It is beautiful.” “We can certainly use the moisture after a couple of very dry years.” “We will still get out of school pretty early.”

Recently I had what seemed at the time like an especially bad week. My computer crashed, and I lost all the information on my hard drive. I had my annual visit to the dermatologist so she could check my light, freckly skin. Though my last few visits had gone fine, this time she found two spots of concern on my back and removed them with simple “punch-cuts.” That was fun! Then, we learned that my son’s FFA contest schedule over spring break would cause him to miss our family vacation.

I was grumbling and complaining about these things, and it took some time for me to step back and recognize what I should have throughout that week. My thinking should have gone more like this… “How blessed we are in this day and age to have gadgets that make our work and life so simple. I can handle a slight blip in the radar.” “I’m thankful for good insurance and access to doctors who can fix potential problems before they become serious health concerns.” “My kids have opportunities to do so many awesome things.”

My minister spoke recently about the complaining of the Israelites while in the desert, as recorded in Exodus 16. No matter what our condition, we humans are prone to complaining. Even the most positive among us will occasionally forget to be grateful, instead grumbling about our circumstances.

Philippians 2:14-15 are verses my daughter’s school has made her own, and I’ve always liked them. My challenge is to always live them.

PRAYER: Most Righteous God, while my worldly ways may cause me to complain, may Your word remind me not to grumble, but exercise gratefulness instead.

“Do everything without grumbling or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, “children of God without fault in a warped and crooked generation.” Then you will shine among them like stars in the sky” (Philippians 2:14-15 NIV).

Girl Drama at Bible Camp

By Hally Franz –

Oh, to be a kid in 2013! Without going into sad speeches about the summers of yesteryear, I will simply say that today’s kids have access to countless exciting activities to fill their summers. There is no reason for boredom when our communities and churches offer so many things to do. Even elementary students attending summer school enjoy specially-designed curriculum to offer as much fun as they do study. Every class and camp has a theme; every adventure and outing is designed to please.

It is at this time each year that I finalize summer calendars for my own kids. My son, now in high school, has an agenda of his own, but my daughter still works with mom to decide what she’ll do over break.

When I mentioned Bible camp to her recently, she reminded me about the girl drama she had at camp two years ago. Those don’t seem to go together, do they? Girl drama at Bible camp? I remembered my sister and I arriving to pick up my niece and daughter, and I recalled the reports from the cabin counselors.

Our girls had become friends with two other girls, who were unrelated BFF’s. The four paired off throughout the week and were doing well. Until, something triggered a conflict. I don’t recall the issue, except that it was insignificant. Soon the foursome split according to their original loyalties, and a verbal brawl ensued. The teen counselors relayed the events to us, and we were mortified. We scolded our girls, but they seemed to be beyond the ordeal by then.

I know this particular camp is a great program, and Roz may well attend this year. I believe that most of the kids attending camp are from Christian families, and they are all probably fine children. However, I also had to recognize that they are little girl humans. That means they are immature and haven’t entirely figured out how to behave yet. They are girls, and they just like a little drama now and then (That may be precisely why I was reminded of this event when the issue came up). And, they are human – fallible and sinful humans.

Perhaps, Bible camp is exactly what Roz needs this year. Now, two years later, she is more mature and may get along perfectly.

Now, what shall we do about drama camp?

PRAYER: Heavenly Father, help me to choose for my children activities and endeavors that will enrich their lives, causing them to be educated and involved citizens, loyal and loving friends, and faithful followers and witnesses for You.

“Dear brothers and sisters, don’t be childish in your understanding of these things. Be innocent as babies when it comes to evil, but be mature in understanding matters of this kind” (1 Corinthians 14:20 NLT).

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