Push Present, Really?

By Hally Franz –

There is a new trend in gift-giving I recently learned about. Or, maybe it’s not so recent, but I’m just behind the trends. It is called the “push present.”

The push present is a gift given by a husband (or significant other) to the mother of his child upon the birth of said child. It is a basically a prize or reward for the mother’s completion of the birthing task. Typically, it is a piece of jewelry, perhaps a ring or diamond bracelet. I’m not sure if the difficulty of the process determines the expense of the gift. It may be that a 5-hour labor merits a moderately-priced bobble, while a 20-hour labor dictates a gift of significant bling. As I said, this is new to me.

No doubt, I will really come across as an old fuddy-duddy because of my position on this particular new custom—and, of course, my use of the expression “fuddy-duddy.” However, I have to say that I find the push present a bit much.

I did not give birth at home, nor did I return to the field for planting the following day. I had four full days in the hospital after the birth of our son via caesarean, and my husband did bring me a modest necklace after Ivan’s arrival. It was a thin gold chain with a heart charm encircling a mother and child. Tim’s gift was unsolicited, unexpected, romantic and meaningful.

Isn’t the journey of making, caring for and raising a child a shared effort? Parenting works best when both mother and father are present and participating, and children benefit when parents share in the process. That doesn’t mean we track and itemize each discussion, act of discipline, and school-related commute on a daily basis to ensure equal work along the way.

Perhaps new mothers should buy new fathers a “tolerated-hormonal-moods token” or a “ran-out-for-cravings reward” to show their gratitude for support offered during pregnancy. I’ve always believed the birth of a beautiful, healthy child is plenty reward for any father or mother.

Parenting is about giving without expecting anything in return, loving unconditionally. While the push present is not wrong, it does seem to imply that every part of life needs to be rewarded, even the most natural and blessed of events.

PRAYER: Father God, bless the new parents of the world. Guide and direct them through this precious and sometimes exhausting journey. Uplift and encourage them, and help them to raise Christian men and women who seek to serve You. 

BIBLE VERSE: “For I have chosen him, so that he will direct his children and his household after him to keep the way of the LORD by doing what is right and just, so that the LORD will bring about for Abraham what he has promised him” (Genesis 18:19 NIV).

Steppin’ Out

By Hally Franz –

Several times each summer, my sister and I, along with our four children, and a few friends as well, invade the home of my mother and stepfather. They purchased an above-ground pool some years ago primarily for the grandkids, and we have enjoyed it immensely. The kids, who have all had swimming lessons, thrash and play, eat copious amounts of hot dogs and frozen pizza, and leave tired and satisfied.

My mother, on the other hand, does not swim. Recently, she commented that perhaps she could take swimming lessons. She’s watched the grandchildren complete summer lessons for years with the same outstanding teacher, and Marilu is willing to take her on as a student.

This is not to be taken lightly. Back in 2009, my sister and I attempted to teach Mom to float.  We stood on either side of her, encouraging her to lift her legs and lean back, all the while with our hands securely behind her. She nearly orphaned all four of our children. By the time the ambulance arrived, Ellen and I had regained consciousness. Though initially traumatized, the kids were better after a bit of therapy, and we’ve since moved beyond it.

Okay, I’m exaggerating – a little!

Mom will turn 68 this year. It remains to be seen if she’ll learn to swim, but it wouldn’t surprise me a bit. She’s terrified of water, but willing to step outside her comfort zone. She did so when she began college after my parents’ 22-year marriage ended; we then received our degrees the same year. She did so when she went on her first date in 25 years with a bachelor nine years her junior. After they married, Mom became a mother again as I turned 24. She has moved from her comfort zone repeatedly, and been blessed because of it.

Our Heavenly Father has often asked His people to step out of familiar places into areas of uncertainty. When God called Esther to become a queen to save the Jewish people, she was certainly young and nervous. When Noah was asked to build an ark at his advanced age, he probably felt ill-equipped for the task.

Students will soon start in new schools and make big grade-level changes. New believers will rise from their pews to approach the baptistery this week. Blessed be those who are willing to walk with God, even when it means moving into strange and unknown places.

PRAYER: Almighty God, be with Your people as we take on new challenges, begin new adventures, and take leaps of faith in our daily lives. Grant us courage and guidance as we walk into unknown realms in our efforts to serve You.

BIBLE VERSE: “Be strong and of good courage, do not fear nor be afraid of them; for the LORD your God, He is the One who goes with you. He will not leave you nor forsake you.” (Deuteronomy 31:6 NKJV).

Anticipate, Commemorate and Appreciate

By Hally Franz –

Shopping for souvenirs was once an important part of the vacation experience. I remember the first time I ever flew. I, along with five other schoolmates, had been awarded a two-week trip to Saltillo, Mexico to study Spanish. It was the summer between my sophomore and junior year of high school, and I had done very little traveling prior to this. I remember diligently shopping for trinkets for family and friends. I bought ceramic ashtrays for my grandfathers and dad. I purchased several dazzling, velvet sombreros for my sister and others. This trip was a big deal to me and my family; I wanted to remember it.

In the thirty years since then, travel has become much more commonplace. Typically, people don’t buy souvenirs for those at home. I’ve even noticed that cameras are sometimes left behind. While at one time, we wouldn’t dream of taking a vacation or trip somewhere without commemorating it with photos, these days people may not even bother, except of course to post a phone photo on facebook. The art of anticipating and reflecting on special events, trips and family vacations seems to have been lost.

Today, we have less time to look forward to exciting events, because they seem to happen with greater frequency. As soon as one event has come and gone, there is another to plan and prepare for. Likewise, we rarely have and/or take time to review pictures and talk about special memories made.

While it’s important to fully appreciate life as it happens, it is also good to savor feelings of excitement before and cherish moments after special times in our lives. As we approach fall, take time to recall and relish special memories made throughout this summer. Thank God for the blessings of family and fond memories to last well beyond this season and years into the future.

PRAYER: Heavenly Father, thank You for the blessings of good times spent with family and friends. Lord, help me to hold these memories in my heart, appreciating each of them as gifts from You.

BIBLE VERSE: “It is good to give thanks to the LORD, And to sing praises to Your name, O Most High” (Psalm 92:1 NKJV).

The Day the Big Guy Came Down

By Hally Franz –

In recent months, the Midwest has been pummeled by strong storms, heavy rains, hail and high winds. Obviously, Joplin, Missouri has experienced the worst of these, but many neighborhoods have gotten a taste of what they endured earlier in the summer.

I’ve referenced a large oak tree in my front yard in at least two prior articles. The context may have been related to its victimization by cicadas or the fact that it provided a wonderful resting spot for an old wagon wheel. Perhaps I mentioned the oak lived nearly 100 years, and it was a key determinant in placing the house when built 30 years ago. It was a dandy!

After one recent day of storms, we lost the big guy. That’s right. The tree split into two trunks years ago, and both stood full and lush with changing leaves for the better part of three seasons, a beautiful baron image of winter for the remainder of the year.

Winds nearing 100 miles per hour tore through the middle of one trunk, sending a quarter of the giant tree and many large limbs thundering to the ground. The cable that once securely braced the twin trunks now snapped, the entire tree had to be removed for the safety of our home. Our natural shade, and the key landmark for driving directions given visitors, now presented a risk and could stand no longer.

My husband mourned for several days, placing a large wooden cross at the open, sunny spot it left behind. A bit dramatic, I think, but for him genuine sadness mixed with male, cul-de-sac humor. Male neighbors commiserated with him after the loss. Personally, I found the $2,000 expense of removing the oak even more distressing.

Aside from the fact that burials are expensive, what lessons can be gleaned from that fateful day?

Saplings and old oak trees are lost. Young and old, weak and strong all will perish one day. Will your legacy be one of stories told and kind words written about you? Will folks speak of you with bitter-sweet smiles? Will our absences be noticed and mourned?

As Christians , we will one day unite in our eternal home above. Until then, it is important to live with compassion and humor, contributing to our earthly homes and the kingdom of heaven daily.

PRAYER: Mighty and merciful Father, heal and encourage ourJoplinbrothers and sisters, as well as others impacted by storms and fires this year. Bless them with assurances of a heavenly home when earthy trials are complete. Until then, guide us as we seek to serve and live for You.

BIBLE VERSE: “In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while, if need be, you have been grieved by various trials, that the genuineness of your faith, being much more precious than gold that perishes, though it is tested by fire, may be found to praise, honor, and glory at the revelation of Jesus Christ” (1 Peter 1:6-7).

Locusts, Storms and Other Trials

By Hally Franz –

The natural chaos taking place in my yard, and many others throughout theMidwestand southeast, will soon subside. The dull buzzing sound which crescendos to a roar, presumably as the work intensifies, will soon cease. The large, slow-moving creatures currently plaguing us will eventually be no more than mounds of crunchy cicada carcasses.

It is the end of May, and in my part of the country, we have been besieged by locusts for three weeks now. This year marks the emergence of two varieties of cicadas. My limited research on the internet tells me they are called frequently called “locusts,” but, in fact, are not at all the same beast. There are two versions: the 17-year batch and the 13-year brood. They seem as menacing as the Hatfields and McCoys, but evidently aren’t terribly dangerous. My little Chihuahua-Daschund may get sick if he gorges himself on cicada crisps, but sturdy trees and plants will survive the attack. They’re expected to remain through the end of June.

I was relieved to find cicadas don’t linger all season, and, then I remembered a Bible study from a couple years ago. In 2009, one gifted friend from our congregation taught the women’s class about “storms.” Specifically, she examined the temporary nature of hardships in our lives. With biblical support, she addressed the trials that early Christians faced, and we explored those encountered in today’s world, as well as God’s purpose for these events and how to grow through them.

I was going through a struggle of my own at that time. I had resigned my position as a guidance counselor after months of soul-searching and prayer, taking a leap of faith by leaving a well-paying job that I liked. I was experiencing high blood pressure and anxiety. That study was exactly what I needed, and I saved only one thing from the summer lessons—a handout that said “storms don’t last forever.”

Throughout this nation and the world, people are suffering, surviving and rebuilding after literal and figurative storms in their own lives. Some face silly and simple dramas of everyday life, like an outbreak of cicadas. Others, like those inJoplin,Missouri, are recovering from devastating losses. There is comfort in knowing that God sustains us through each trial no matter how long it lasts, and He will be there when it’s over to encourage and strengthen us once again.

PRAYER: Merciful Father, be with those who face struggles throughout our community, country and world. May they find strength and encouragement through You, and may faith grow stronger as a result of those trials.

“For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory” (2 Corinthians 4:17 NKJV).

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