Millstones

By Cheri Cowell –

At the ruins in Petra lie a large set of stones. This “mulos onikos,” literally, a mill turned by an ass or donkey, is what the Bible refers to as a great millstone. On top of the conical-shaped stone rode a second hollowed-out stone or handstone. The upper stone was probably turned with handspikes in much the same way as an old-fashioned ship’s wheel was turned. The material to be ground was fed into the upper cone which formed the hopper. As our parable for today states, the upper millstone of a handmill would be more than sufficient to sink the condemned, and the punishment would be more easily carried out.

The occasion of this discourse was an unbecoming contest among the disciples for precedency. “At that time the disciples came to Jesus and asked, “Who, then, is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?” (Matthew 18:1). Hearing this Jesus offers the following parable. The connection is clear: pride is a millstone around our necks and if we don’t remove this weight, it will sink us.

“If anyone causes one of these little ones—those who believe in me—to stumble, it would be better for them to have a large millstone hung around their neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea. Woe to the world because of the things that cause people to stumble! Such things must come, but woe to the person through whom they come! If your hand or your foot causes you to stumble, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to enter life maimed or crippled than to have two hands or two feet and be thrown into eternal fire. And if your eye causes you to stumble, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to enter life with one eye than to have two eyes and be thrown into the fire of hell” (Matthew 18:6-9 NIV).

PRAYER: Thank You, God, for such wonderful visual examples in Your Word. Help me identify prideful attitudes in my own heart that not only weigh me down but have the potential to drown me in the sea of sinfulness.

Says Who

By Rhonda Rhea –

Whenever someone is working really hard to make a solid argument on an issue they’re passionate about, it’s easy to get frustrated. I always advise against trying to turn the argument around with “I’m rubber and you’re glue.”

“Says you” doesn’t really do much for a person’s believability either. And anytime I’m trying to defuse a heated discussion, I try to remember that “I know you are but what am I” is not the best way to go either. I might opt for “takes one to know one” except that I would be insulting myself at the same time and that seems counterproductive.

Using words as weapons is always counterproductive. It also doesn’t take long to figure out that words don’t really bounce either. They can wound. And when we’re bent on wounding, we miss a big opportunity to grow in character and wisdom. Proverbs 18:2 says, “A fool does not delight in understanding, but only wants to show off his opinions,” (HCSB). Trading wisdom just to show off? Bad trade.

Not only do we miss the opportunity for growing in understanding, but we miss the blessing of blessing. Every time you use your words to bless someone else, it becomes a rubber blessing of grace that bounces right back around to stick to you.

Paul teaches in Ephesians 4:29 to “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear,” (ESV). The word “corrupting” is from a Greek word that was originally used for rotten, putrefied food. I’m at this very moment recovering from merely looking at a bag of spinach in my college daughter’s fridge yesterday. We were digging around for salad fixings and our conversation went something like this:

Me: “Kaley, your spinach has brown juice sloshing around in the bottom of the bag.”

Kaley: “Yeah, don’t eat that. Also, don’t eat that bacon.”

Me: “No prob. I never eat bacon that’s…blue.”

The smell made my eyes water a little. Major reek-age. Do I even need to say that I wasn’t the least bit tempted to put any of that in my mouth? How sad it is when we pay more attention to the salad we put in our mouth than the words we let out of it.

We’re told in that Ephesians passage that we’re to choose a word that “fits the occasion”—words that are just right. That brings us back to the blessing of blessing. Paul doesn’t only tell us to stay away from the words that reek, but he gives us specific instructions for how our words should smell instead. When people get a whiff of our words, they should be taking in the sweet scent of grace.

It’s not about what “says you.” It’s not about what says me, either. It all comes back around to “says Him.” Jesus Himself said, “For the mouth speaks from the overflow of the heart,” (Matthew 12:34, HCSB). I don’t want to overflow liquefied spinach or bacon that might move. I want to allow Jesus to so fill my heart that my heart overflows grace words to all around.

Not “Yo mama.” Not “Talk to the hand.”

The scent of grace. Not “so’s your face.”

Yet Without Sin

By Cynthia Ruchti –

In all the artwork—paintings, sculptures, etchings, stained glass—of the crucifixion, have you ever seen Jesus on the cross with a smile on His face? The art comes from artists’ imaginations, clearly, since there was no photography at the time. But did any change the natural grimace into a grin?

It seems a ridiculous question. Who would expect Jesus to have smiled through that kind of agony, despite how courageous, strong, and divine? It would seem closer to insanity than joy if He had been laughing His way through being crucified, or had cracked a smile while the crown of thorns cracked his skin open. How would it have served His Father’s purposes if He had treated the crucifixion lightly, even if He could have risen above the pain to “give His mama a little grin”?

But did the sober, tortured, pained expression on His face mean He’d lost His faith? Of course not.

Then why do we judge others when they feel their anguish deeply and walk through seasons when the pain of their situation puts a tortured expression on their faces?

Years ago, a woman told me that when her mother died of a sudden heart attack, she and her sister—both young moms at the time—traveled together by train to the funeral. The woman telling the story said her tears flowed softly and freely most of the train trip. Her sister chided her to stop crying, shaming her for being sad. “Mom’s in heaven. Get a grip. We should be celebrating for her. Quit with the tears.”

The woman heeded her sister’s rebuke, wrongly thinking her tears were a sign of weak faith. It was decades before she allowed herself to cry again.

Jesus felt the full brunt of the agony He bore, but we’re told even then He was without sin. Grief and sadness are natural reactions to pain. We trust God with our lives, trust Him in dire circumstances, trust Him in the blackest of moments—as Jesus did—and still experience deep grief.

A recent news report told the story of yet another prominent figure—a person of profound faith—whose son committed suicide. I pray no well-meaning person tries to tell that dad and mom to quit crying. Their agony is not sin. It’s the human heart’s response to tragedy. Faith can remain strong, even when the tears flow.

PRAYER: Jesus, I’m in awe of how much Your cross is still teaching me, all these years later. Father God, Your Word tells us there is—there IS—a time to cry. Increase my sensitivity to those around me who wear their anguish on their faces. Help equip me to be a better listening ear and leaning post until their tears subside.

“For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin” (Hebrews 4:15 ESV).

A Mother’s Love

By Judy Davis –

For over 30 years, my friend Janice prayed for her son who was addicted to alcohol. She took him to his first rehabilitation program, bought his first Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) book and went to meetings with him. She visited him in the hospital, rehab programs, and detention centers.

The years have come and gone. Janice has reflected on her son’s past many times. She knows alcoholism and drugs destroy lives. What more can she do? What more can she say?

The only way to arrest alcoholism is total abstinence. It’s up to her son to quit for good. Janice can’t blame anyone but her son. She didn’t cause it, can’t control it, and can’t cure it. There are medications now that can help and she hopes he will call a local hospital or clinic and ask them for assistance. She stressed the importance of him stepping out and getting help. Janice knows in her heart it will take God for her son to be totally healed. He will meet us at our point of need.

God’s Word is powerful! Janice said sitting in His presence reading His Word each morning for years has been the key to overcoming the pain in her heart. She allows the Holy Spirit to help her as she reads the Word.

Reading devotional books and commentaries are not the same. Let go and let God speak to you personally through His Word. He will make the Scripture come alive as He reveals words of wisdom through revelation. As we meditate on what we read, pray to comprehend what God is saying and then submit to His divine direction.

Pray for your children and talk to them about accepting Christ into their lives. Help them to turn their heart towards the light. That light that shines brighter and brighter as we live closer and closer to Christ. Most important we should do all we can to love them through the situation and be there for them.

PRAYER: Father, please help those loved ones facing alcohol, drug, and other addictions to overcome this sin. Please help the parents of those caught in this bondage. Only You can give them peace in the midst of the storm.

“Listen, my son, to your father’s instruction and do not forsake your mother’s teaching. They are a garland to grace your head and a chain to adorn your neck” (Proverbs 1:8-9 NIV).

Cutting the Unbiblical Cord

By Diane Mayfield –

I never dreamed giving our daughter away in marriage would be so difficult for me emotionally. It has been. I’ve struggled with this reality for almost two years. The gap between my intellect and my emotions on this leg of life’s journey has been expansive.

My daughter is an intelligent, spunky, outgoing, lovely young woman who married a great guy that we all enjoy and love. They are creating their own life together as husband and wife. Hooray! This was always our dream for her, part of our equipping her for God’s plan. I rejoice in this and praise God for what He’s done in allowing my husband and me parent this delightful young woman.

So, what’s the problem?

The problem is that my heart isn’t where my mind is. After thirty years of being a big priority in this woman’s life, I am second fiddle and it hurts. I know, I know. This is what I parented her for. I’m trying, but until today, my efforts were not succeeding. I’m weary of the battle. I’ve struggled with feelings of betrayal, loneliness, rejection, disappointment and anger. I misinterpret many things because I’m reading them through eyes that are blinded in so many ways.

A few weekends ago, I was hurt once again. I was horribly hurt and tired of it. I made assumptions and started telling myself untruths. I created quite a story inside my head, leaving my stomach in one big knot. The chatter in my head went something like this. “Well, I failed. I attempted to build in family values but they are not there. I don’t matter. I’m nothing.” The assumptions and lies went on and on until I was sliding into a deep hole of darkness. After venting to God and my husband, maybe not in that order, I moved on with the day.

Then I saw a cord-like image in my mind floating in the air. It was an umbilical cord. An umbilical cord provides support and sustenance between the mother and the baby until the baby can sustain life on its own. What I had created in my imagination was an “unbiblical cord” between my daughter and me. It was time for surgery.

I surrendered that day to God, the Master Surgeon. He cut away the emotional “unbiblical cord” that I wanted to maintain. I might have moments when I try to reattach it out of my fear and loneliness but I am certain the Holy Spirit will remind me of the surgery performed this day. The only umbilical cord I need now is the biblical one. It’s the one that connects me to God through Jesus.

Then came new vision. While rocking my six-month-old grandson, God opened my eyes to the woman my daughter had become. In my mind’s eye I saw my darling daughter delighting in her nephew as she played with him. She bent down to soothe his tears when he cried. No longer did I see my daughter, but a young woman, truly separate from me. In that dark room, rocking that precious child, light came to my blinded eyes.

With the “unbiblical cord” gone, I can now enjoy a different connection with a beautiful young woman who just happens to be my daughter. A different bond is forged between two separate children of God.

I hesitated to share this story with you. I do so because I suspect someone else might be going through the same thing but feeling too embarrassed to admit it. I never dreamed I would find the reverse “leaving and cleaving” so hard. One of you might be in that place too. If so, my hope for you is through the gentle work of the Master surgeon and healer you too will have the “unbiblical cord” cut. Then you and your family member or friend can start a new journey, separate, but joined together in a new relationship.

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