Bald-Headed Babes

May 12, 2020 by  
Filed under Humor, Stories

By Steph Prichard –

The taillights of the car ahead of me suddenly flashed red. Ahhh, clever me for maintaining that traffic-manual-safe-space between us! I braked to a successful stop inches from the car’s bumper. Not so the guy behind me. Wham. My head lurched forward, then back, then a second time as I rammed the car in front of me after all.

The guy who had now upped my insurance premium got out of his car and hastened to the passenger side of mine. As I rolled down the window, his mouth fell open and his eyes widened. What? Did I look like I was going to bite off his head?

He swallowed hard. “I w-wanted to make sure you’re all right. Do you need anything? I’ve called in the accident.”

Aw, what a nice guy. Sorta. I assured him I was okay, and he sped to the car in front of me to check on its driver.

Traffic on the left slowed to a crawl so that passengers could stare into our three-car zoo. Not one to spurn an on-stage appearance, I hammed it up. I smiled, waved, held my hands palms up and shrugged my shoulders. I got the same mouth-gaping, eye-widening response the young driver had given me.

I decided I’d better look in the mirror. Oh my. My head was as bald as a boiled egg. I had literally flipped my wig into the back seat. I reached back and retrieved my, ahem, hair, put it on, and got out of the car. This would definitely go to the top of my Most Embarrassed Moment list. At least I could explain to the young driver that I was receiving chemo treatments and had lost my hair. But all those spectators driving by? Bwahaha, no wonder they had looked stunned. Some bald-headed babe was making quite a fool of herself!

Bald-headed babies are cute, though, aren’t they? And isn’t this the season for The Babe? To the world, the little guy in the manger is a comforting image. What would they think if they looked at what He “grew up” to be? Here’s how Jesus is described in Revelation 19:12-16: “His eyes were like a flame of fire, and on His head were many crowns…. He was clothed with a robe dipped in blood, and His name is called The
Word of God.…  Now out of His mouth goes a sharp sword, that with it He should strike the nations.… He Himself treads the winepress of the fierceness and wrath of Almighty God. And He has on His
robe and on His thigh a name written: King of kings and Lord of lords.”

Ouch. The cuddling factor is definitely gone.

For Christians, the babe in the manger is the long-awaited seed promised in Genesis 3:15.  But we recognize that what we celebrate at Christmas is only the beginning of the fulfillment. The King of kings and Lord of lords is coming again, and next time it won’t be as a bald-headed babe.

About Stephanie Prichard

Stephanie Prichard is an Army brat who traveled the world and fell in love with its people and languages. She writes a humorous grammar column for the American Christian Fiction Writers Journal, and is co-authoring an adventure-suspense trilogy with her husband, Don.
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