Who am I?
By Ronnie Wyatt
A man walks into a Doctor’s office and is greeted by the receptionist, “Hello Mr. Johnson. Just take a seat over in the lobby and the Doctor will be with you in just a few minutes..”
He makes his way to the lobby and sits down beside another gentleman and begins to thumb through a magazine. After a few moments the gentleman strikes up a conversation with him.
“So,” says the gentleman. “Are you from around here?”
Comics: Tastes Like Chicken
Watch Out For That Tree
By Ronnie Wyatt
A state trooper pulls over a car on a lonely back road and approaches the driver. "Sir, is there a reason you're weaving all over the road?"
The driver replies, "Oh officer, thank goodness you're here! I almost had an accident. I looked up and there was a tree right in front of me. I swerved to the left and there was another tree in front of me. I swerved to the right and there was another tree in front of me!"
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Saving All The Seats
By Ronnie Wyatt
A man lay sprawled across three entire seats in the posh theatre. When the usher came by and noticed this, he whispered to the man, "Sorry, sir, but you're only allowed one seat."
The man groaned but didn't budge.
The usher became impatient. "Sir, if you don't get up from there I'm going to have to call the manager."
Again, the man just groaned, which infuriated the usher who turned and marched briskly back up the aisle in search of his manager. In a few moments, both the usher and the manager returned and stood over the man. Together the two of them tried repeatedly to move him, but with no success. Finally, they summoned the police. The cop surveyed the situation briefly then asked, "All right buddy, what's your name?"
"Sam," the man moaned.
"Where you from, Sam?" asked the officer.
With pain in his voice Sam replied, "The balcony."
Hello My Name Is
By Ronnie Wyatt
Hello, my name is Ronnie Wyatt. Well, it’s not actually “Ronnie”. My REAL name is Ronald. For some reason, my parents decided to give me a REAL name AND a NICKNAME at the time of my birth. In fact, they told people, “His name is Ronald, BUT we are going to call him Ronnie.” I don’t understand that. If they liked “Ronnie” so much, why didn’t they just go with that one in the first place? It’s like they wanted me to have two separate identities. On one hand I am the “official document signing, Ronald” and on the other hand, I am the “happy go lucky, Ronnie”. On one hand, I am about “Business” and, I guess on the other hand, I am supposed to be about, “Woooooooo”.
