Furry Friend

April 4, 2021 by  
Filed under Humor, Stories

By Karen O’Connor –

One morning as I reached for my breakfast food in the back of my station wagon at a campground in the Sierra Mountains, I noticed that several of the plastic bags had holes in them. One in particular was badly punctured. I had filled it with various nuts and dried fruits. When I picked it up, most of the contents fell out.

How strange. I was certain I’d put this mix in a brand new zippered bag. “Oh well, I’ll deal with this later,” I muttered. It was time for the group’s morning hike and I didn’t want to be late.

My friends and I returned to our site that afternoon and I opened my car to take out a snack and some water. To my surprise several more bags were full of holes. Even my Kleenex tissues were perforated. I assumed it was an insect and let it go. Flies and mosquitoes were all around so I chalked it up to life in the outdoors.

At the end of the week we broke camp and said our good-byes. Then I drove down the mountain to the motel where I planned to spend the night before heading home the following day.

I organized my gear, did a couple loads of laundry, ate dinner, and headed for bed. The next morning when I opened my car a terrible stench hit my nose. What is that? I wondered. I didn’t have any fresh food in the car so I was really puzzled.

Then suddenly I noticed a small furry creature curled up in a little open box I had left on the floor of the back seat. A long tail hung over the edge. A field mouse. “Eeek!” I shrieked and shivered at the sight. Poor fella must have snuck in when my car was open, and then died in the extreme heat of the day after I locked my car.

“Help!” I called to one of the employees at the motel. “A dead mouse. I can’t bear to touch it. Would you please remove it for me?”

The man chuckled, reached in, and carried the little guy, box and all, to the trash container. I thanked him and off he went. But then I had a shame attack. It was just a field mouse, after all. Why did I make such a big deal out of it? He was one of God’s creatures, too. And if the Lord could make a place for him on the earth, surely I could allow him to help himself to a few nuts and berries.

“But ask the animals, and they will teach you, or the birds in the sky, and they will tell you; or speak to the earth, and it will teach you, or let the fish in the sea inform you.
Which of all these does not know that the hand of the LORD has done this?
In his hand is the life of every creature and the breath of all mankind” (Job 12:7-10 NIV).

Faith, Family and Freedom

March 30, 2021 by  
Filed under Humor, Stories

By Judy Davis –

I noticed once again how beautiful our country is as our family traveled on vacation. We passed through the rugged mountains of Tennessee, the blue grass of Kentucky, and the amber waves of grain in Indiana.

While visiting Ruby Falls, in Lookout Mountain Tennessee, a lady leaned over my shoulder and whispered, “How can anyone see this and not believe there is a God?” My granddaughter softly spoke pointing to her chest, “God is real and He lives right here in my heart.” The lady laughed and said, “You are so right my child, don’t ever lose the child that is in you.”

Later, I thought of the lady and her words realizing it’s not that we don’t believe there’s a God, but do we know Him? How can we know Him if we don’t read His Word? If we begin each day reading our Bible with a joyful attitude, it can break bondages of despair.

America seems to have forgotten the Bible but our founding fathers knew the value of the Bible as the foundation of morality. George Washington said, “It is impossible to rightly govern the world without God and the Bible.” Abraham Lincoln said, “I believe the Bible is the best gift God has ever given to man.” Patrick Henry said, “The Bible is worth all the other books which have ever been printed.”

Years ago our former president Bill Clinton spoke the following at the state of the union address. “Let’s be honest. Our problems go way beyond the reach of any government program. They are rooted in the loss of values, the disappearance of work, and the breakdown of our families and communities. We cannot renew our country when, within a decade, more than half of our children will be born into families where there is no marriage.”

Look at our nation today and this is exactly what has happened. Our leaders need to wake up and move forward ruling under the admonition of the Lord. America is beautiful, but has many problems. What can we do? We can start where we are by taking it back to basics, back to truth, back to honor, back to character, back to integrity, back to morality, back to work ethics, and back to the Bible.

“If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land (2 Chronicles 7:14).

Driving Me Crazy

March 26, 2021 by  
Filed under Humor, Stories

By Kim Stokely –

I pulled up behind a minivan today while waiting for a red light. Through the rear window I could see the glow of a television screen.

I sighed.

Not that I begrudge you if you own such a decked out vehicle, but oh, how I remember the simpler days when parents had to listen to inane children’s songs over and over again on rides around town. Like prisoners in a torture chamber, those of us who survived Raffi’s “Baby Beluga” a hundred times-a-day became tougher parents; able to withstand the onslaught of the latest teen sensation without batting an eyelash.

And if your child is watching television while you’re driving, you no longer have to endure the constant barrage of questions I remember so well:

“Mom! Where are we going?”

“The store.”

“Why?”

“Because we’re out of milk.”

“Why?”

“Because you and your father and your sister drank it all.”

“Why?”

“Because you like it.”

“Can we get a toy at the store?”

“No.”

“Why not?” Sniffle, sniffle.

“Because it’s a grocery store, they sell food, not toys.”

“Why?”

“Because they do.”

“But why?”

“I don’t know why. They just do.”

“They do what?”

“They…uh…they…” I’d completely forgotten what we were talking about. “Because.”

But lest my train of thought get permanently derailed, I’d get kicked from behind by a light up sneaker. The blue and red LEDs flashing in the rearview mirror like lights on a police car. “Why don’t they sell toys at the food store?”

And our conversation would circle back around like an airplane in a holding pattern.

I feel sorry for those who no longer take pleasure in a four-year-old’s random thoughts. I learned a lot about my kids on those rides when we had errands to run and doctor’s appointments. No one can enjoy a puffy cloud like a child. Or dump trucks on a construction site. And a trip through the car wash became a wild, underwater adventure with giant blue squids and hurricanes.

Without a television to distract us, car rides also became lessons in faith for myself as well as my kids. Nothing makes you hold your tongue quicker than a precocious two-year-old. Instead of letting loose with my anger, I often found myself yelling, “God…bless that man and help him get to wherever he’s going safely!” and “Please God, not another red light.” A premier parking spot in the pouring rain became a time of praise, “Thank you, Jesus!”

As my kids are now old enough to drive themselves, I have a new perspective on God’s sense of time. Psalm 90:4 reminds us, “…a thousand years in your sight are like a day that has just gone by” (NIV). When you’re in the midst of diapers and play dates you can’t believe you’ll ever miss the chatter, the clutter and the constant attention your kids demand. But I know I do. Perhaps I’ll dig through the basement, I’m sure I’ve got an old Raffi CD hiding in a box down there. If not, maybe I’ll download a song or two and drive around town singing “Baby Beluga” for old times’ sake.

Praying for the Unknowns

March 19, 2021 by  
Filed under Humor, Stories

By Dawn Wilson –

Since we don’t know the future, we might say that many of the things we pray about are “unknowns.” God knows the outcome; we don’t.

I love praying with my granddaughters. One of my favorite prayers is about their future. “If you’re going to get married someday,” I tell them, “then your husband is growing up somewhere in the world.” Megan, my oldest granddaughter, seemed intrigued by this notion, that unknown little boys can be affected by our prayers. I remind her that the boys are not unknown to God, and He cares about them.

Late one night, as I tucked two of the girls into bed, my mind was distracted by things I needed to get done before bedtime. I forgot to pray with the girls. As I turned to leave the bedroom, Jenna sat up and called out, “Grammy! Aren’t we going to pray for our husbands somewhere in the world?” That was the first time I realized that our little prayer ritual had deep meaning for the girls.

Another time, on the way to the mall, I chatted with the granddaughter I’ve dubbed “Missy Pink Pink.” We talked about school, ballet class and an outing she took with her other grandma; but I laughed hard as she suddenly blurted out, “Grammy, my husband is in Antarctica!”

Months later, Missy Pink Pink told me her husband now lives in Hawaii. Perhaps she figures she’ll have a better opportunity to meet him there. I’d love to help her find him, maybe on the balmy shores of Kauai.

Praying about the unknowns of life, including a “somewhere in the world” husband, shouldn’t be unusual for God’s children. Eternity is deeply planted in our hearts (Ecclesiastes 3:11), and most of our lives are pinned to the future. We can pray about our future because we believe God, who is our life (Colossians 3:4), is already there. We need God and what He can do in our lives, and we pray believing that He answers our prayers (Matthew 7:7).

God wants our inner joy to be full both now and in the future, and Jesus told us simply to “ask” for what we need (John 16:24). He wants to give us the desires of our heart, and He transforms us so that we delight in Him and desire what He wants for us (Psalm 37:4)—those things that align with the Word of God and the truth that Christ is in us.

“You may not get married,” I told my granddaughters. “Maybe that’s not what God has for you. But if His plans include marriage, then your Someday Husband needs our prayers. We can pray he will keep his heart pure. We can pray that he will learn how to lead a home. We can pray for lots of things!”

What are your greatest “unknowns” today? Are you struggling with finances, and not sure what the future holds? Do you have a prodigal child, and you fear what’s ahead? Is your marriage falling apart? Is your health failing?

Initiate an intimate conversation with God and see what He will do. Pray with confident faith, believing God will answer. The answer may not come in ways you expect or, in the process, God may change your desires; but we’ll never move forward in our prayer journey with the Lord until we take those first faith-filled steps into the unknown.

Life’s Laughs

March 17, 2021 by  
Filed under Humor, Stories

By Jodi Whisenhunt –

An old maxim states that laughter is good for the soul. Proverbs 17:22 agrees, “A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.” So what do you do when life just isn’t funny, when your spirit is crushed and your bones dried up? Take to Facebook, of course, and let your friends deliver a dose of delight!

Here’s a joke from my friend Holly:
Two nuns were driving through Transylvania when a vampire jumped out and blocked their way. The second nun said to the first, “Show him your cross!” The first stuck her head out the window and shaking her fist said, “Get out of the road you toothy jerk!”

Get it? Very punny?

How about this one from John:
A duck walks into a hardware store and says to the clerk “Got any grapes?”

The clerk says patiently, “No, this is a hardware store. We don’t have any grapes. Try a grocery store.”

The duck leaves.

The next day the same duck walks into to the same hardware store and says to the clerk (who is, coincidentally, the same clerk), “Got any grapes?”

The clerk says, a little less patiently, “No! Like I told you yesterday, this is a hardware store; we don’t sell grapes here.”

The duck leaves.

The next day the duck walks into the store again and says to the clerk, “Got any grapes?”

By this time the clerk is thoroughly put off with the duck and says, “No! We don’t have any grapes! This is a hardware store! If you come in here and ask me again I’m going to nail your feet to the floor!”

The duck leaves.

The next day the duck walks into the hardware store and says to the clerk, “Got any nails?”

The clerk, relieved, says, “Finally! A sensible question! But no, I’m sorry. We’re all out of nails. I just sold the last package.”

And then the duck says, “Good. In that case…got any grapes?”

Oh, that’s funny! Are you laughing?

This was a clever caption that circulated recently:
If you fall, I’ll be there. ~Floor

Are your sides splitting yet, or do I need to head over to Twitter too?

Here’s one I just made up myself:
I’m fighting a battle with my bathroom scale. I must be winning, because I’m sure not losing!

Ba-dum-ching!

In all seriousness, though, the burdens of our daily lives can carry great weight. Giggle off some stress and lighten that load a little. It’ll carry oxygen to your brain, release some endorphins, and may result in solving long-suffered struggles. Who knows? You may even find whirled peas.

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