Love on Him

By Lori Freeland –

“I hate night class. My throat is on fire—”

During the lengthy pause, I wondered why I had answered my cell.

“—and I got a 65 on the test.”

Kyle’s cranky attitude set my stress on fire.

Twice a week, he griped about Spanish night class and twice a week I lectured about ten key ways to study for college.

I gripped the phone. The semester ended in a few weeks. Not much time left to pull up his grade. “Come home and we’ll talk about it.”

He cut our connection with a typical, “Whatever.”

What did he expect? You have to work hard in college—even if you are still in high school. His college transcript reflected these grades. That’s what dual credit meant.

That’s not what he needs to hear.

Lord, of course that’s what he needs to hear. Slacking off is not an option. Where’s his drive? His motivation?

Love on him. No lectures. No advice.

Over the last year, I’d given a lot of advice in an attempt to fix him. Study more. Use better time management. Make a plan. Beg for extra credit.

Love is the fix.

This has nothing to do with love, Lord. Love doesn’t motivate him or push him to try harder. Look at all the mistakes I made when I was seventeen. I didn’t realize my choices then would affect my life now.

This isn’t about you. Love on him.

The garage door opened with a slow grind and a few seconds later, the back door slammed. Kyle wandered in, dropped his backpack on the couch, and kicked off his shoes in the middle of the hallway. I opened my mouth—

Love on him

—closed it and wrapped my arms around him. Taller than me, he rested his chin on the top of my head. Where was my little boy?

He shivered. “I’m cold and my throat hurts.”

Ah, there he was.

Love on him. Say the opposite of what you want to say.

I wanted to say, you were sick last week. Instead, I hugged him tighter and mumbled into his chest. “Do you want to take a hot bath? I can make you some hot chocolate.” I waited for his standard, “Whatever.”

It didn’t come. He pulled back and lifted the corners of his mouth, just a bit. “A bath and hot chocolate?” His smile deepened. “You gonna run this bath and make the hot chocolate?”

I headed into the kitchen and grabbed a mug. “Right now.”

“We’re not gonna talk about the test?”

“Nope.” I filled the cup with milk and stuck in the microwave.

He picked up his backpack and shoes and headed for the stairs. “Cool. Be right back.”

I slumped against the counter. You were right, Lord. You always are.

Kyle needed loving, not fixing. He needed understanding, not pressure—so he could relax, renew, and recharge.

Exactly the way I do when Jesus loves on me.

Now, Lord, help me remember that next week.

“Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God” (1 John 4:7 NIV).

Letter to a Beloved Atheist

By Janet Morris Grimes –

Dear Friend,

I am not sure where to start. I see you over on the opposite sideline, pacing, contemplating, but never wondering. Often, our eyes meet for a second too long, but we just turn away, afraid to address our differences.

But I love you, and with that comes this obligation to share what is on my heart, whether you want to hear it or not. Because I love you enough to allow you to be mad at me, if that’s what it takes.

I love you enough to no longer remain silent.

Here is what I know about you. Your path has been difficult, filled with betrayal by the people you loved the most. You craved acceptance, but received just the opposite. You feel as if you have let everyone down at one point or another, so rather than carry that guilt around with you, you had to let it go. Your survival demanded it.

You lost most of the people who have been close to you; some to death, painful and unexpected. Others walked out of your life by choice, which left even deeper scars. You searched for a life raft to keep you from sinking when surrounded by one storm after another. But a timeline of disappointments left you feeling more abandoned than ever, and you decided the only person you could truly depend on was yourself.

Still, I know that at one time, you believed.

But something within you has changed. Did it become easier to decide there was no God at all, than to consider the possibility that if He was here, He must not care about you?

After all, how could a God who loves you allow such terrible things to happen?

I have asked that same question many times.

So, I get it. And I know this relationship I have with God is not something I can shove down your throat, nor can I be the extension cord that connects the two of you; it is something you have to discover for yourself.

At times, I hear you mocking me, even as I pray; even when you are the one that drops me to my knees. You stand with your guard up, ready to debate every theory from evolution to eternity; the beginning to the end. You crave the argument, and any chance to spread doubt in others, as if you enjoy keeping score.

I will never buy into the battle that pits God vs. Science. Science is the study of all that God has created; the universe is too magnificent to have happened accidentally. The One who knit the world together thought of everything, and He does not need our help to figure it out.

Still, I love you enough to listen to your opinion. For now.

But, Eternity is where I draw the line.

Because I love you too much to allow you to be separated from God forever. Away from God, no good thing can exist, which is the definition of Hell.

It all points to Heaven. This is the reason life makes little sense at times. This world is only temporary.

In the end, I need for you to be there with me. In Heaven, back in the arms of the One who created you.

Because you are perfect in my eyes.

And I love you.

Luke 16:27–28 “…I beg you, father, send Lazarus to my family, for I have five brothers. Let him warn them, so that they will not also come to this place of torment.”

Weed Control

By Jennifer Slattery –

Last August our family went on a week-long vacation. We came back to a dead, bone-dry lawn. Turns out, we’d blown the fuse connected to our automatic sprinkler system. Apparently, there hadn’t been enough rain to keep our grass alive. Unfortunately, the weeds thrived, taking over our yard.

I spent the next afternoon tearing through the dead grass to reveal the soft dirt beneath, humbled by how closely the yard paralleled my spiritual life. Without the deliberate watering of our sprinkler, our grass had to “catch what fell”. Unfortunately, the occasional summer storm wasn’t enough, and without my constant care, those weeds that could have been eliminated easily upon first sprout, extended their roots deep within the soil, devouring any drop of water that fell. As the grass died, the weeds grew stronger.

All for lack of water. In our absence, the grass was left alone. How often do we do that in our spiritual lives? As believers, we know we’ve got the Holy Spirit and we love to talk about how it’s God’s job to grow and change us. All good and true, but God never intended us to be passive observers. Like my parched, brown grass, if we’re waiting for God to shower His Spirit upon us, chances are our hearts are nearing dehydration. And as they do, it isn’t long before weeds begin to sprout, reaching their roots ever-deeper into our hearts and minds. Weeds like selfishness, laziness, greed, bitterness and discontent. Like our lawn, my heart needs care and nurture. It is my responsibility to see that I am fed. And I need to be on the alert, scouring the deep recesses of my heart for those pesky little dandelions about to seed.

So what do you do once you notice those weeds invading your heart? As always, the best defense is a good offense.

“So I say, let the Holy Spirit guide your lives. Then you won’t be doing what your sinful nature craves. The sinful nature wants to do evil, which is just the opposite of what the Spirit wants. And the Spirit gives us desires that are the opposite of what the sinful nature desires. These two forces are constantly fighting each other, so you are not free to carry out your good intentions.  But when you are directed by the Spirit, you are not under obligation to the law of Moses.

When you follow the desires of your sinful nature, the results are very clear: sexual immorality, impurity, lustful pleasures, idolatry, sorcery, hostility, quarreling, jealousy, outbursts of anger, selfish ambition, dissension, division, envy, drunkenness, wild parties, and other sins like these. Let me tell you again, as I have before, that anyone living that sort of life will not inherit the Kingdom of God.

But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against these things!

Those who belong to Christ Jesus have nailed the passions and desires of their sinful nature to his cross and crucified them there. Since we are living by the Spirit, let us follow the Spirit’s leading in every part of our lives” (Galatians 5:16-25).

Jesus promised if we abide in Him, He will abide in us. When we stand in the presence of God, meditate on His holy Word, and surrender to His limitless love, the weeds die. And in their place sprouts love, joy, peace, patience, goodness, and self-control.

Practicing Speaking for Christ

By Dianne E. Butts-

In a recent online discussion, Christians asked how should we respond to people suffering like those in Japan after the earthquake, tsunami, and nuclear power incident? Many said we should “just listen” in compassionate silence. Others said we should not quote Scripture. Why? Because we only offer weak platitudes.

Are those our only two options: silence or platitudes?

It seems to me Christians have become far too practiced in silence.

This topic has really become personal to me since the flare ups of war in the Middle East and the natural disasters in Japan. Some may disagree, but I can’t help but think the Lord’s return isn’t far off. We may have precious little time left and I want to make the biggest impact possible for the Kingdom of Christ and bring as many people as possible into Christ’s Kingdom in the time I have left on this earth. Are you with me? Then how are we going to accomplish it?

We start, of course, with prayer: that God will place people in our paths and place us in situations where we can make a difference for Him. But what’s next? Well, we’re going to have to speak up and talk to those people. I’m all for the popular thought by Saint Francis of Assisi: “Preach the gospel at all times. If necessary, use words.” But there comes a time when we need to use words: to challenge wrong thoughts about God, to explain how to accept Christ. It is here, I think, many Christians are terribly unpracticed.

So, I’ve decided it’s time to practice.

After deciding that, there I was the other day visiting with people after a meeting and one man starts speaking his opinion of Christianity. It’s not the first time. I remember a similar conversation when we first met a few years ago. The other day he said a lot of the Christian values the United States has are actually from Rome, like “majority rule.” I told him, “‘Majority rule’ is not a ‘Christian value.’ I’ve never heard that called a ‘Christian value’ before.” He went silent for a while, changed the subject, spoke to others who were there. But before we left he turned back to me and said he still remembered that conversation we had a few years ago and what I said then. I do remember he had pushed me far enough that I started spouting back. (And you have to push me pretty far to get me there!) But what did I say?!

So I said to him, “Uh oh. What did I say?”

He reminded me in that conversation, when he said something about Christians, I said, “I don’t know any Christians who think like that. And I know a lot of Christians.” Then he said something else and I said, “I don’t know any Christians who believe that.” And he said something again and I said, “I don’t know any Christians who act like that.”

He said, “You made me realize I’ve been putting Christians in a box and I shouldn’t because some of them aren’t like what I thought.”

I had no idea I’d spoken up in a good way, let alone said something that made a difference to him, that challenged his thinking, that made him rethink what his understanding of Christian is.

Since then, I’ve only felt bolder about speak up more often. Lord knows, I need the practice.

“But when they arrest you, do not worry about what to say or how to say it. At that time you will be given what to say, for it will not be you speaking, but the Spirit of your Father speaking through you” (Matthew 10:19, NIV).

Mom Won

By Kathi Woodall-

This past Sunday I was getting ready to go to church. I called my girls down to breakfast. My second eldest appeared at the top of the stairs, helping my youngest stumble down the stairs. The youngest was pale and crying that her ear hurt. As she reached the bottom of the stairs and I scooped her up, I could tell she also had a fever. Obviously, church was not going to be part of her day. I discussed the options with my husband and he offered to stay home with her so I could go to church. My mind raced at multi-tasking speed through that possibility. He could stay home…I could go teach my class…I could enjoy the time with friends…I could be fed spiritually by the sermon…He could get food ready for lunch when the rest of us came back home…

Something inside of me said, “Stop.” Perhaps I had had enough of juggling all my roles to make sure everything was done. Perhaps I wasn’t feeling completely healthy myself. But I knew I was supposed to stop all else and be a mom. Everything else could wait or be done by someone else that time. That morning, my baby needed me and I needed to be available for her.

Learning to discern which responsibility is the most pressing at any given moment is a difficult and challenging task. There are no magic formulas for how to balance all of it. Doing so is going to look different for each woman and is going to change as you grow through different seasons of your life. As I shared, this time being a mom won. Sometimes I need to walk away and let my husband be a daddy while I grow in another role. Sometimes I need to stop all else and sit at the feet of Jesus. At another time, a friend’s need may be great and I share my time with them. And yes, sometimes we must even make our home the priority to provide a safe, clean environment for our families and friends.

I have learned one thing that will help women balance their different roles. We should not dwell on things like a clean house, making our own clothes, working ourselves to death, preparing beautiful feasts for every meal, keeping all the laundry done, climbing the corporate ladder or anything of this world that keeps us from what is truly important – the things of God. All of those tasks are good things to do, but unless they are done as unto the Lord, they are just works that will wear us out and have no lasting benefit.”

“A woman who fears the Lord is to be praised” (Proverbs 31:30b NIV).

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