The Other Side

By Lori Freeland –

My eighth grader slumps at the kitchen table, his mouth curving down into his frustration frown, as I leaf through his unfinished homework.

Tears fill his eyes. “Dad didn’t help me while you were gone. He played Wii every night.”

Heat rises from my chest, up my neck. Settles into my face. My, “What?” comes out a strangled half cry-half scream as I lunge for my cell. Before my hand touches the phone, a small voice breaks through my fury.

Wait.

Wait?

Wait an hour.

Are You crazy, Lord? An hour will douse the flame of my anger. In an hour, I will forget all the nasty, witty accusations forming in my head.

Have you considered the other side?

There’s another side?

His side.

Hmm. I ponder that. Just a little. Because right now, my side screams at me to run off on a tirade of what did not get accomplished this last week while I was on my girl’s only cruise. The cruise my friend, Gwyn, dubbed our chickation.

I don’t want to remember that he encouraged me to go. Crying and carrying on about how I feel punished for taking this time for myself seems a better idea. I want to throw the unfinished homework at my husband when he comes through the door while I yell about the unopened emails pertaining to the week’s activities. Like the basketball team photos my daughter missed.

Remember, the other side.

I have spent the better part of my life as half of a whole, married to the same man, for twenty years. Throughout our many conflicts, the other side lurks. Just waiting for my attention. I don’t like to listen. In the center of my frustration and anger, looking at the other side means letting go of my own hurt and resentment.

Take my chickation. I don’t want to remember my husband taking our children to a movie on Monday just to hang out with them on his day off. I don’t want to admit he forgot the basketball game and team pictures because he cleaned the house as a welcome home present. For me. I don’t want to think about how he changed the sheets on our bed on Friday, in honor of my clean sheet fetish, and slept on the couch to keep them fresh for my return on Saturday. Or that he made a special trip to Central Market to concoct a fabulous dinner while I unpacked.

I want to keep my anger. And if I think about how he not only paid for my weeklong chickation, but also encouraged me to have a good time while he took on all my jobs for the week in addition to his own, I can’t keep my anger.

During my wedding, I recited Corinthians 13:4-5. “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.”

Hmmm. Is not easily angered.

The other side. His side. I allow myself to think about the good and release the bad. I don’t even need to wait the hour. Suddenly, I don’t feel like making that phone call. I think I’ll wait until he gets home, wrap my arms around him, and whisper thank you in his ear instead.

Help My Unbelief

By Janet Morris Grimes-

I know myself well. So much so that it bothers me at times. I am well aware of my weaknesses. I spend more time with my flaws than I’d like to. And some days, I’d give anything to just snap my fingers and be rid of them forever.

Maybe you have felt this way.

But I have learned this much. My imperfections are magnified with each day I spend focusing on them. Anxieties, insecurities, guilt, regrets. The more power I hand over to these things, they more they take over my life.

I wonder what would happen if I got over my shortcomings and embraced the more abundant life God intended for me. I wonder if the reason I feel so alone is because God created me to be unique, and I will never be fulfilled until I am fully following His, and only His, plan for my life. I wonder what would happen if I took such massive leaps of faith that I have no choice but to let God carry me the rest of the way. I wonder if all along, He was just waiting for me to leap. I wonder if the only weapon Satan has left to use against me is myself.

Yes, I wonder.

What if I did the opposite of what comes naturally to me, each and every day? What if I got out of the way, recognizing that the less there is of me, the more of Him others can see? What if God is able to use these weaknesses to touch the lives of others? What if my weaknesses only serve as a spotlight to God’s strengths?

What if, by not believing in myself, I am actually saying to God that I don’t think He can do it? Can He really use me, in spite of myself?

There is a story in Mark Chapter 9 about a man who brought his demon-possessed son to see Jesus. He begs Jesus, in verse 22, “If you can do anything, take pity on us and help us.”

If he can? Jesus challenges in verse 23, “If…? Everything is possible for those who believe.”

The heartbroken father answers in a painfully honest way, a way in which most of us can relate.

“I do believe. Help me overcome my unbelief!” (Mark 9:24).

That is my prayer for each of us, that God will recognize our unbelief and strengthen us. We do believe. We want to. We hate the doubts, the regrets, the times we forgot to leap. Help our unbelief, and use us to touch a broken world.

Bumper Bowling

By Susan Dollyhigh –

Bumper Bowling is like a bumper life. I watched as my granddaughter, Katelyn, rolled the pink bowling ball around in the carousel until her five-year-old fingers found the holes to slide into. She picked up the six-pound ball and in a wobbly run made her way to the foul line where she came to an abrupt stop. Swinging her small upper body around to the right, she brought the ball up with both hands and heaved it down the bowling lane. Thump. Thump. Thump. The ball dribbled out of control before making contact with the lane where it swirled from the right gutter to the left gutter and once more to the right before reaching the pins and slowly knocking over all ten. With a celebratory jump, Katelyn smiled, “Yes, a strike.” Katelyn was Bumper Bowling, a game for children, which meant her ball was protected from falling into the gutters by pads positioned on each side of the bowling lane.

Marital problems, health issues and financial concerns had left me feeling like a bowling ball dropped and thumped from one crisis to the next before swirling out of control, rolling into the gutter and landing in a pit. Faced with so many difficult decisions, I didn’t know what to pray for, so I prayed as David did in Psalm 25:4, “Show me your ways, O Lord, teach me your paths.” If I could get out of the pit and onto the Lord’s path, I would find the hope and peace promised in God’s Word. Remembering Katelyn’s Bumper Bowling, I asked the Lord to place bumpers so I couldn’t veer from His path. “Lord,” I prayed, “I want to go Bumper Bowling.”

Susan Shelton Dollyhigh is a freelance writer, columnist and speaker. Susan is a contributing author in Spirit and Heart: A Devotional Journey, Faith and Finances: In God We Trust and The Ultimate Christian Living. Susan’s articles and devotionals have appeared in Connection Magazine, Exemplify Magazine, Mustard Seed Ministry, P31 Woman, The Upper Room and The Secret Place. She is also a contributing online writer for ChristianDevotions.us and InternetCafeDevotions.com.

Waiting for Ephesians 3:20

By Dianne E. Butts –

Last month I told you about the short film I’d be making in February for the “168 Film Project” contest. As I write this, I can’t really report on that whole story because it is still in progress, so I’ll leave that for next month. This month, let me tell you a little of what’s been going through my mind during this whole exciting crazy adventure of faith.

I wonder if you’re like me. I like to plan. I like to know what’s happening. I like to figure things out in advance and then work the plan. But this whole act of faith thing, making a movie in a week adventure, hasn’t been like that exactly.

Yes, we’ve been making lots of plans. Yes, we’ve been working hard to get things in place so when the time comes for the camera to roll, we’ll be ready. But there is a ton that we can’t plan for.

We can’t write the story or script until we get our assigned Bible verse. So we can’t really know what we’re going to need. So we can’t get everything figured out. So I’m feeling a little crazy about it all.

This is where faith enters, right?

But my mind asks, Will God work everything out? Will He bring people to the fund-raiser dinner? Will that dinner make enough money to pull off this project? Will we be able to write a decent story? Will we find actors? What about props, make up, hair? I think we still need a gaffer. (Now, tell me again what a gaffer is?) What about…

Wait a minute. What happened to my faith walk? This is me, trying to do it all, trying to plan it all. But this is a faith walk, right? God will come through. I know He will.

Do you get like that? I do. When we can view the big picture from afar, we can say, “Sure. I know God will show up. He’ll work everything out. No need to worry.” But when we’re sitting in the middle of the chaos, and we need the funds, and we need the people, and we need so much and we can’t see where anything we need is going to come from…we feel a little panicky and wonder if God will really come through with everything we think we need.

If there’s one thing I’ve heard loud and clear from the good people at the “168 Film Project,” it is to trust that God will show up! He is in this project and we get to be amazed at what He will do for us as we pursue making a short film in a short time with a short budget based on His Word.

Based on His Word. How can you go wrong with that?

So as I lie awake at night wondering if anybody is going to show up at the fundraiser (Please, Lord. At least enough to pay for the spaghetti!), I remind myself over and over that this is what it’s like to live waiting for Ephesians 3:20:

“Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us…” (Ephesians 3:20, NIV).

Immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine…When we’re waiting on Ephesians 3:20, that’s what we’re waiting to witness. It will happen. God has promised.

“…to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen” (Ephesians 3:21).

May we each live this month expecting God to show up in Ephesians 3:20 ways!

Dianne is the author of the new book, Deliver Me: Hope, Help, & Healing through True Stories of Unplanned Pregnancy (www.DeliverMeBook.com) and an aspiring screenwriter. Her script, A Cowboy’s Faith, was inspired by a true story in her Deliver Me book and was a finalist in the 168 Project’s “Write of Passage” 2010 contest. (Currently a producer is talking with Dianne about making her script into a short film!) When she’s not writing, she enjoys riding her motorcycle with her husband, Hal, and gardening with her cat, P.C. in Colorado. www.DianneEButts.com

When Prayers Seem To Fail

By Warren Mueller –

Have you ever felt like you are talking to yourself when you pray or that your prayers don’t seem to go any further than your ceiling? What causes this? There are several reasons. First is the belief that the quality of our prayers depend on how we feel about them. When we are hopeful and optimistic, we tend to think better of ourselves and that God is listening. When we are depressed or worried, we are more likely to become frustrated, give up or wonder where God is.  However, the Bible says that we are to pray without ceasing which means that God expects us to pray whether we feel like it or not (1 Thessalonians 5:17). God is ever present and unchanging so he is not influenced by how we feel.

God may not answer our prayers because they are not in accord with his will and plans. Isaiah 55:8-9 says that God’s thoughts are not like those of mankind nor are his ways like those of man, but rather just as the heavens are higher than the earth so are God’s thoughts, view and ways beyond ours. Therefore, God may choose not to answer our prayers or he may answer them in ways that are different than what we prayed.

God may not answer our prayers because we are holding onto sinful ways. Psalm 66:18-19 says that when we cherish or hold onto sin God will not listen to our prayers. When we choose to hold onto sin, we rebel against God and evil rules in this part of our lives. Therefore, we must confess our sins and forsake them if we expect God to listen to our prayers (2 Chronicles 7:14; 1 John 1:9).

Sometimes God says yes, but the answer is delayed or slow in coming. One possible reason for this is that God wants to teach us to trust in him and learn dependence upon him so he can direct our paths (Proverbs 3:5-6). Finally, we need to remember that spiritual warfare is raging throughout this world. Satan and his demons are inciting rebellion and exerting their will. They do this through evil temptations of this world such as the pride of life which is excessive focus on getting more and better things or money. Also, evil can ensnare us through the pursuit of power and influence at the expense of relationships as well as through the weaknesses of our human nature such as selfishness, lust, greed and envy.

Daniel fasted and prayed for twenty-four days before he received an answer to his prayers (Daniel 10: 2-6). An angel appeared to him on the twenty-fourth day and told Daniel that, from the first day that he prayed, the angel was sent from God with the answers. However, the angel was held up by a demon called the prince of the Persian kingdom. This angel could not get through until help arrived in the form of the angel Michael, presumably because Daniel continued to persist in prayer (Daniel 10:12-14). This is challenging and encouraging because it shows the importance of persisting in prayer until answers are realized. How many times have we stopped praying because we have not seen any results? I wonder how many angels are stuck battling opposing demons because we do not persist in prayer.

Lord Jesus forgive us when we give up praying because it seems like you are not listening or answering. Help us to trust that you have heard our prayers and do respond to them. Help us to persist with humble dependence and hope in our prayers until your angels deliver your answers.

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