Spring Cleaning of the Heart

By Cindy Martin –

Often times when we’ve been battered by the inevitable hard stuff of life, not only are our minds and bodies affected but also our spirits. Bitterness, hardness, harshness and cynicism can easily take root during an extended season of trial and pain. As a result our demeanor is changed without us even recognizing the slow fade that takes place.

I believe that David recognized that fade in his own life when he made peace with God after his incident with Bathsheba. He had hardened his heart towards God and even became angry when the prophet Nathan confronted him with his sin.

“Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me” (Psalm 51:10 ESV). In his deeply heartfelt prayer of repentance, David asks that God would not only create within him a clean heart but also that he would renew a right spirit within him. He wanted God to not only forgive him for the sin he had committed but also to remove the residue it had left on the intangible part of his being. He knew that his heart was not naturally bent towards God – he had proved that by his actions. Yet he also knew that he needed God’s forgiveness AND His power in his life to soften his heart and “bend” it back towards his Savior.

Not always is this a quick or easy transformation. In fact it is often the exact opposite. Yet it’s this process of softening that provides the clearest opportunity for God’s transforming power to shine through us. I liken it to being in the sun – you don’t often recognize the glow the sun’s rays bring to your skin until after you’ve spent time in its presence. Likewise, spending time in God’s presence changes an intangible part of our being that is clearly reflected in our demeanor.

Prayer: Lord God, thank You that You not only want to forgive my sin, You also desire to renew a right spirit within me. Grant me the grace to linger in your presence that I may reflect the radiance of Your transforming power.

Verse: “A happy heart makes the face cheerful, but heartache crushes the spirit” (Proverbs 15:13 NIV).

This Side of Eden

By Cindy Martin –

A while back, I watched the movie, “The Boy in Striped Pajamas.” Its content disturbed me to the depths of my being. A movie depicting the horrors of the Holocaust through the eyes of two eight year old boys, it “put skin on” on the atrocity of ethnic cleansing. I was struck by the innocence of the boys. They lived less than a mile apart from each other, yet their ethnicity meant their life experiences were worlds apart. The hateful attitudes and comments expressed by the adults in the movie, followed by their mortifying actions, congregated like a dark cloud over my soul for several days.

More recently, I caught a viewing of “The Trade of Innocents,” a graphic portrayal of the realities of human trafficking. Again, my heart felt a wave of heavy, dark sadness as the weight of injustice seemed to suffocate my soul.

Perhaps the most overarching internal reaction I felt was one of disbelief. How could humans do this to one another-especially to innocent little children? What is going on inside of them that allows them to think this is OK?

Early this morning we got a phone call telling us that our niece Danielle celebrated her 36th birthday in heaven last night after losing a courageous battle with breast cancer. There is great rejoicing in heaven at her ultimate healing and we celebrate that, but there is also great sorrow here right now. She leaves behind her adoring husband Brad and three precious children ages 7, 5, and 2. The children cried inconsolably as Daddy gave them the news that Mommy was gone. Again, I am moved to tears at the pain precious innocent lives must endure.

The words in an e-mail from a dear friend, express this angst of soul so well, “this side of Eden is brutal.” I daresay, some days, it is excruciating. Bumping up against the brutality of our human existence has a way of reminding us that this is not our final home – pointing to the day when God will right all that is wrong in our world. One day children of all nationalities will live in complete harmony without fear of exploitation or loss or pain. What a day that will be!

PRAYER: Until then, God give us the grace to lean deeply into You as we authentically bring You our pain, declare our dependency on You and allow You to pour healing, power and perspective into our lives.

SCRIPTURE: “In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world” (John 16:33 NIV).

She Looks Like Me on the Inside

By Cindy Martin –

I stood in the hallway of my daughter’s school waiting to pick her up from volleyball practice as she and one of her coaches came out of the locker room. My daughter, Autumn, and I exchanged smiles as she walked toward me. Her coach looked at me and then looked back at Autumn and commented, “I would have never known you two were mother and daughter, your coloring is so different”.

Autumn matter-of-factly replied, “That’s because I’m adopted.” I could tell that her coach was feeling a little uncomfortable at her self-perceived faux pas but it was not an issue for Autumn and me.

We had talked often and openly about her becoming our ‘keeping kid’ so, as we turned to leave, I simply said, “No worries, she looks like me on the inside.” Autumn flashed a grin at me, locked her arm in mine and we headed for the car.

As we drove home that night, I mused on our interaction with Autumn’s coach. “She looks like me on the inside…” Her personality couldn’t be more opposite than mine, yet my daughter is very in tune with my thought processes and emotions. As she develops more independence as a teenager, I see and hear my influence on her in the way she thinks about things and the way she approaches life. Blips of panic began to surface on the radar screen of my mind. Memories of missed opportunities, selfish attitudes and lost tempers flooded my mind. Guilt started to suffocate my spirit. What if she does look like me on the inside? That may not necessarily be a good thing.

I wrestled with these thoughts for several days until God’s word came to slay the dragon of insecurity within me. “You didn’t choose me. I chose you” (John 15:16a NLT). Not only did God choose me to be His child but He also chose Autumn to be my child. I get to be her mom.

“The Lord says, ‘I will guide you along the best pathway for your life. I will advise you and watch over you'” (Psalm 32:8 NLT). God did such a good thing when He brought Autumn into our family. “And I am certain that God, who began the good work within [us], will continue His work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns” (Philippians 1:6 NLT).

Prayer: Thank You Lord that You equip me for whatever life assignments You choose for me. Grant me grace and a desire to lean into the power and wisdom You make available.

The Trouble With Texting

By Cindy Martin –

My husband had just transferred to a new company and his new position required several hours of online training and certifications. It also required him being out of town more than he had before. Desiring to be intentional about our relationship, I knew we’d have to find ways to stay connected so physical distance did not also become emotional distance.

True to my multi-tasking nature, I asked my daughter to type the words I dictated to her into my phone as I drove her to school. “Hey Baby, I’m so proud of you….thank you for how hard you work for our family….love you……”

Later that day, I spoke with my husband on the phone and asked him if he’d gotten my text. When he said “no,” I sent it again, but it still didn’t go through. I’d been having some trouble with my phone so I took it in and sure enough, there was a problem. They replaced the SIM card, said it would take about an hour to recalibrate and then everything should be fine.

Right on cue my phone started, “buzz, buzz, ding, ding, beeping” as a flood of texts, messages and notifications announced their arrival – albeit delayed. I was scrolling through to see if anything still required my attention and just what I had missed during this temporary cyber hi-jacking. Nothing urgent surfaced and I was ready to soothe any anxious thoughts when my eyes glanced at a text that I assumed was from my husband. It read, “Hi, I’ve received two messages that are obviously meant for someone else, but it isn’t me. Best check your number baby!”

Gasp, gasp, ugh! “Are you serious? How did this happen?!?” Upon investigation I found out that my daughter had manually typed in my husband’s number rather than using my contact list or our existing text trail. In doing so, she was one digit out in the prefix she dialed. So close but oh so far. It reminds me of the verse in scripture “These people honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me” (Mark 7:6b NIV). There is much focus and attention put on love this time of year, and this incident will serve as a reminder to me to be diligent in properly communicating and directing my love…..especially to the Lover of my soul.

PRAYER: Lord, help me to love those I say I love with my actions and not just my words. May they feel my love for them in my tone of voice, my response to their needs and the priority I put on our time spent together. Lord, may that also be true of my relationship with You.

“These people honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me” (Mark 7:6b NIV).

100% Pure

By Cindy Martin –

Would you believe me if I told you I was a long lost daughter of Queen Elizabeth’s, and that I was banished from the royal family because I slurped my soup rather than sipping it? I probably can’t fool you on with that lie.

Would you believe me if I told you I once handed Queen Elizabeth a bouquet of flowers, and as I curtsied she nodded her head and said thank-you? Is this the truth? It’s a bit more difficult to discern if this is a lie or truth, isn’t it?

Like this example, the messages we hear from culture, our family and friends and even those that whisper inside of us are often difficult to discern between truth and deception.

If you had her size, you’d be beautiful too.
Your marriage would be better if your husband treated you like that guy does.
You’ll never get that job; you’re not smart enough.
If your co-worker liked you, she’d invite you out for lunch.

The most dangerous lie is the one that is closest to the truth. But there are no half-truths. Truth is pure, which means it has no contaminants. Truth is 100% true. Satan, the Father of Lies, takes truth and injects it with a lie and this deception wreaks havoc with our souls and minds.

God calls us to truth. God is the author of truth and His desire is for us to be so familiar and submersed in truth that we can spot a counterfeit. Deception kills, destroys and tears down. Truth builds up, holds fast and gives life. Our ability to discern truth comes from a relationship with God and He infuses us with wisdom and truth.

PRAYER: Lord, give me a passion for truth and may I cast off anything that is deception. Help me to know the difference.

“Keep me from deceitful ways; I have chosen the way of truth” (Psalm 119:29 – 30 NIV).

P.S. I did hand flowers to the Queen, just as I described. That’s the truth!

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