Blow Torch Anger

By Rosemary Flaaten –

The flash from the blow torch came at lightening speed. Singeing the table, it turned the weathered grey to charcoal black. There was no denying the permanent scar left by the flash of intense fire.

Does your anger ever strike out like a blow torch?

All too often little injustices and irritants pile on top of each other throughout my day. The ledger in my mental accounting system seems to be added to in rapid succession. One more frustration is tallied and then it happens—the flash of anger. Once my blow torch of anger flares, there is no retraction. The person on the receiving end will not be unscathed.

Ephesians 4:26 does not instruct us to avoid anger. Rather, we are told to not sin in our anger. Blow-torch flashes of anger are sinful. They singe people’s character. They raze people’s worth. They force relational chasms. They do irreparable damage.

The Psalmist provides us with a different approach to anger. “Complain if you must, but don’t lash out. Keep your mouth shut, and let your heart do the talking. Build your case before God and wait for his verdict” (Psalm 4:4-4 TM).

Consider having a pad of sticky notes in your pocket. Every time one of your coworkers, friends or family members does something that causes you to feel indignant or hurt, write out your complaint on the sticky note. The act of chronicling your complaint will become a physical transaction that symbolizes removing the anger from your heart and mind.

But, rather than posting those complaints for review or accumulation, shred them or toss them in the trash. By destroying them, you indicate that you are handing them over to God, trusting Him to deal with that person as He chooses. Allowing God to be the final judge alleviates us from having to play that role. We can trust Him to always pronounce a fair verdict that is wrapped in love.

The warmth of God’s love will always be preferable to the fire of our blow-torch.

PRAYER:  Lord, help me to be a purveyor of love and forgiveness rather than an accumulator of anger.

“Go ahead and be angry. You do well to be angry—but don’t use your anger as fuel for revenge. And don’t stay angry. Don’t go to bed angry. Don’t give the Devil that kind of foothold in your life” (Ephesians 4:26-27 TM).

Super-Mom Strikes Again!

By Kathi Macias –

Each May, as Mother’s Day approaches, I realize how amazing it is that my children lived to grow up. Super-Mom I wasn’t, though I wanted to be. It seemed the harder I tried, the more I failed.

One day in particular stands out in my mind. It was one of those days when life gets too busy to worry about achieving goals. (Are you relating yet?) In fact, it was all I could do to remember to brush my teeth in the morning and put gas in the car before leaving for town. As it turned out, I remembered my teeth but forgot the gas.

It was also my day to volunteer at the pre-school where my youngest son, Chris, attended. As a result, we were late, since the Auto Club was backed up on emergency calls that took priority over an unorganized mother and an upset three-year-old waiting on the side of the road.

“Mom, let’s go,” Chris whined, his as yet undiagnosed ADHD kicking in as he bounced on the backseat. “I want to go to school, Mom! Mom, let’s go! Mom!”

Minutes before my head exploded, the cavalry showed up, and in a matter of minutes we were back on the road and racing to our destination—which was not a good idea because we had to pull over again, due to the flashing red lights and wailing siren immediately behind us.

By the time we finally arrived, Chris had missed snack time and was not a happy camper—nor were the two ladies trying to ride herd on twenty-three spinning, squealing pre-schoolers. Chris, already in his spinning, squealing mode, jumped right into the fray.

“Where have you been?” Jeannie, the other volunteer, demanded. “We really needed you. We have extra kids today—”

“I’m sorry,” I said, haphazardly hanging my jacket on the already-full coat closet hooks. It slipped right off, but before I could pick it up and try again, Jeannie grabbed my arm and said, “Come on. We’ve got to settle them down for story time.” We began to peel kids off the ceiling and walls and nudge them toward the story circle where we hoped they would sit quietly and listen for ten or fifteen minutes.

Miss McDougal, the actual teacher of these pint-sized tornadoes, joined us. “It’s like trying to organize a bunch of earthworms, isn’t it?” she asked. I grunted, unable to say more as I made my way to the circle, a child attached to each hand and one wrapped around my leg. The worst of the shrieking seemed to be coming from one last rebel in the far corner who refused to join the group until he got his snack.

Of course, it was Chris. I sighed, resisting the impulse to abandon the majority of the group that had finally assembled in the circle and instead go drag my child by the scruff of the neck to his proper place and insist he settle down and behave. Wisely, I allowed Jeannie to coax him over with an orange slice and a promise of more when story time was over.

Not only was I failing as Super-Mom, I barely qualified as an acceptable human being. But though my son glared across the circle at me throughout story time, wordlessly accusing me of starving him to death, he now tells me I was the best mom ever.

Go figure. It took me a lot of years (decades even!) to realize that being a Super-Mom was less about baking and icing 100 cupcakes on an hour’s notice and more about loving my kids the best I could—and trusting God for all the rest. If that’s where you’re at as a mom today, then be encouraged. One day your children really will “rise up and call [you] blessed” (Proverbs 31:28).

Adapted from the book How Can I Run a Tight Ship when I’m Surrounded by Loose Cannons? by Kathi Macias

Rumbly in My Tumbly

Then She Became a Mom

By Jarrod Spencer –

She always dreamed of becoming a mom. She played Barbies as a child, anticipating the time when she became the young woman Barbie represented. She took care of Cabbage Patch dolls like they were children of her own, looking forward to that special day—the one when she would have a real baby to feed, burp, nurture, change its diapers, etc.

As she matured into a teen, she was called on to take care of other people’s children. By the time she was a college student, she had developed a special knack for connecting with kids. She showed and taught them what it was like to own their own faith. Kids were drawn to her. They respected her. Adults admired her. She had a personality that people, young and old, were attracted to.

A few years later, she married. She cherished and adored her husband. Anticipated the day when they would become parents. That anticipation grew and grew, but as the months, then years, passed with no baby, questions were raised. “Why am I not able to have a baby?” After several years of praying and hoping, the optimism waned—almost vanished.

Then, after several years of trying, praying, and hoping, a pregnancy test revealed two lines! Could it be? Finally, she found out what many other women get the chance to experience—the feeling of carrying a baby.

Through the next several weeks, she praised God over and over, while praying for the safety and the health of the baby.

Then Oliver came into her life—a beautiful, blue-eyed baby boy. The answer to her many prayers. She took to being a mother as if Oliver wasn’t her first. He is a gift from God, but more importantly, he was given a greater gift—being blessed to be raised by the mother who had waited years for his arrival. All the waiting was worth it, and it couldn’t have happened to a more deserving woman other than my beautiful wife.

PRAYER: Father, thank You for giving my wife children. She is such a great mom. Continue to use her in mighty ways as she serves in the office of Mom.

“Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her” (Proverbs 31:28 NIV).

Practicing Speaking for Christ

By Dianne E. Butts-

In a recent online discussion, Christians asked how should we respond to people suffering like those in Japan after the earthquake, tsunami, and nuclear power incident? Many said we should “just listen” in compassionate silence. Others said we should not quote Scripture. Why? Because we only offer weak platitudes.

Are those our only two options: silence or platitudes?

It seems to me Christians have become far too practiced in silence.

This topic has really become personal to me since the flare ups of war in the Middle East and the natural disasters in Japan. Some may disagree, but I can’t help but think the Lord’s return isn’t far off. We may have precious little time left and I want to make the biggest impact possible for the Kingdom of Christ and bring as many people as possible into Christ’s Kingdom in the time I have left on this earth. Are you with me? Then how are we going to accomplish it?

We start, of course, with prayer: that God will place people in our paths and place us in situations where we can make a difference for Him. But what’s next? Well, we’re going to have to speak up and talk to those people. I’m all for the popular thought by Saint Francis of Assisi: “Preach the gospel at all times. If necessary, use words.” But there comes a time when we need to use words: to challenge wrong thoughts about God, to explain how to accept Christ. It is here, I think, many Christians are terribly unpracticed.

So, I’ve decided it’s time to practice.

After deciding that, there I was the other day visiting with people after a meeting and one man starts speaking his opinion of Christianity. It’s not the first time. I remember a similar conversation when we first met a few years ago. The other day he said a lot of the Christian values the United States has are actually from Rome, like “majority rule.” I told him, “‘Majority rule’ is not a ‘Christian value.’ I’ve never heard that called a ‘Christian value’ before.” He went silent for a while, changed the subject, spoke to others who were there. But before we left he turned back to me and said he still remembered that conversation we had a few years ago and what I said then. I do remember he had pushed me far enough that I started spouting back. (And you have to push me pretty far to get me there!) But what did I say?!

So I said to him, “Uh oh. What did I say?”

He reminded me in that conversation, when he said something about Christians, I said, “I don’t know any Christians who think like that. And I know a lot of Christians.” Then he said something else and I said, “I don’t know any Christians who believe that.” And he said something again and I said, “I don’t know any Christians who act like that.”

He said, “You made me realize I’ve been putting Christians in a box and I shouldn’t because some of them aren’t like what I thought.”

I had no idea I’d spoken up in a good way, let alone said something that made a difference to him, that challenged his thinking, that made him rethink what his understanding of Christian is.

Since then, I’ve only felt bolder about speak up more often. Lord knows, I need the practice.

“But when they arrest you, do not worry about what to say or how to say it. At that time you will be given what to say, for it will not be you speaking, but the Spirit of your Father speaking through you” (Matthew 10:19, NIV).

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