Setting Goals

By Cami Checketts –

Is anyone else fed up with their New Year’s Resolutions? January 2nd I’m on fire about my lengthy list of goals and then a couple of weeks into the year I realize something–my list is too long and I’m miserable. It doesn’t work for me to make too many goals at once. I get overwhelmed and frustrated. I now make goals that will be with me for a lifetime, not just a quick fix to get me through the first weeks of January.
I decide on one goal each month and write it on the top of my calendar. For example, my goal might be: Strength train on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. I actually write it on my calendar like an appointment so there’s no way to flake. Or my goal could be to eat 5-6 veggies a day. I make a slash mark on my calendar for each fruit or veggie I eat. When I hit my goal I can choose chocolate instead of an apple (a little reward is a wonderful thing!).

There’s something about writing that goal on the top of my calendar. I look at the calendar often so I can’t forget about or neglect my goal. If you’re not a calendar person, you could place your goal on the mirror or fridge or maybe put it as a reminder each day in your cell phone. Do what’s effective for you.

Twenty one days makes a habit. A month-long goal is perfect. If you can make it a month, you will have turned your great goal into a fabulous habit. Then next month you can make a new goal and keep progressing. When I am feeling really ambitious, I will set goals in a few different areas. Physical, spiritual, and mental. But this is only when I’m feeling really ambitious and the rest of my life is pretty settled (boys aren’t involved in too many activities, husband’s not ward mission leader, I’m not expecting a baby). Most of the time I am thrilled with one goal a month and that is plenty to work on.

Think about the type of goals you’re setting. As you’ve probably noticed from my examples, my goals are all things that I can accomplish. They are not something vague like: Hit the NYT bestseller list with my next novel or lose twenty pounds for my class reunion this summer. Those might seem like powerful and motivating goals, but they may be out of our control. All I can do is write the best novel I am capable of and work night and day to promote said novel. Even if I eat perfectly and exercise diligently, I may lose fifteen pounds but not twenty. Am I then a failure?

I get annoyed when women come to me wanting me to help them lose weight for an event. Weight is not a great indicator of health and quick weight loss rarely lasts. What I think most of us really want is: to look good, to feel healthy, to be strong and active and enjoy loved ones. Do people really walk up to you and ask how much you weigh? Can you imagine? People do notice how you look. But they really notice how you carry yourself with confidence, the smile on your face, and the spirit you have about you.

Set goals that will make you your best you. Set goals that you can achieve. Here’s my latest: Smile all day long even when I feel like screaming. I’ll let you know how that goes.

Cami Checketts is an author and exercise scientist. She and her husband are expecting their fourth baby. (He’s praying for another boy!) Her latest book, The Sister Pact, is in stores now. www.camichecketts.com © 2010