Stuck Like Glue

November 9, 2011 by  
Filed under Humor, Stories

By Jodi Whisenhunt –

I should not be allowed anywhere near Superglue. Remember the old TV commercial where the construction worker hangs by his hardhat from a support beam? That could so be me.

OK, so I was opening a new tube of Superglue the other day. My son had stepped on his Nintendo Gameboy and had broken off a piece of plastic. Supermom to the rescue, right? Sure.

Anyway, as I said, it was a new tube. That means you have to unscrew the lid, turn the pointy nozzle around, and jab it into the seal. Simple.

I managed steps one and two alright, but the seal refused to puncture. I jabbed and forced and contorted the tube all around until finally, clear, sticky gel oozed out. And oozed some more. And some more. I tried to catch it on a piece of cardboard, intending to then dip toothpicks for my fine, crafty Nintendo repair. But the ooze kept spewing out of the tube.

I tried to screw the nozzle back on, but gel squirted out around the edges and ran down the side. Keep in mind this is happening in a matter of seconds. So I got the lid in place and tossed the thing in the trash.

Except that it didn’t let go.

No, the tube was stuck to my forefinger and thumb. And my forefinger and thumb were secured to the middle and ring fingers. And the fingernails on the opposite hand were freshly coated with a new layer of nail strengthener.

I was tempted to panic but instead remembered my pediatrician’s warning that cooking oil dissolves Superglue. You see, two of my kids have had cuts sealed with glue instead of with stitches, so the doctor had told me to keep the glued area clear of oils. Time to ignore the doctor’s orders!

I pried open the olive oil and drenched my fingers over the sink. I rubbed and wiggled and scraped myself to freedom, then washed away the residue. The menacing tube dared me to touch it. It knew my fear as it challenged from the counter. In one fell swoop, I tore off a paper towel, scooped up the glue, and dropped both into the waste bin.

Ah, sweet freedom!

I think it may be what Jesus had in mind when He said, “Remain in me, and I will remain in you…remain in the vine…remain in me…I am the vine; you are the branches” (John 15:4-5). Except that the opposite effect occurs. If I remain in Superglue, I can do nothing. However, if I remain in Christ, I can do all things. I am going to stick to Him like glue.

And I think maybe Duct tape will work fine on the Gameboy.

About Jodi Whisenhunt

Jodi Whisenhunt is a Christian wife, mom, homeschooler, writer, editor, kid taxi, very tired person who is blessed with Rheumatoid Arthritis. She is an Amy Writing Award recipient and the Senior Content Editor of The Christian Pulse. Her highly acclaimed Magical Mouse Schoolhouse (http://www.magicalmouseschoolhouse.com) shows kids how to learn while they play when Disney IS school.

Comments

3 Responses to “Stuck Like Glue”
  1. Dianne says:

    What a sticky situation, Jodi! I didn’t know, but am glad to, that cooking oil solves it. Personally, I don’t dare use S-glue! Scary to think what I might do… :-)

  2. Alan Mowbray says:

    As a US Navy submariner… I could tell you some superglue stories…
    Best laugh of the day!

  3. Marsha says:

    Jodi,
    I didn’t know about the oil removing Superglue! Wish I’d had known it a lot sooner, could have saved me some trouble!
    LOVED the article!

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